Sequential Rationality

From the Oxford English Grammar Dictionary

2006-03-05T23:33:00.000-05:00

"His parents are atheists, and mine are eccentric too."

That cracks me up.

Via Marginal Revolution

2006-03-01T12:29:00.000-05:00

Another "Markets in Everything" post over at MR caught my attention. Here is the post about a governmental corruption case where the representative had a "bribery menu" listing prices for awarding contracts including the statement that every additional one million in contract value would cost $50,000 in how much was needed for the bribe. Alex has this to say:

"What's most disturbing about this is how low the prices were, $50,000 for $1 million in contract value. Now let's remember Econ 101, what makes prices low? That's right, competition. So who was Cunningham competing with?"

Now I'm about as cynical as anyone, but I think Alex isn't giving this his usual thoughtful analysis. First of all, selling contracts is similar to an auction for a unique item and so we would expect the price that it is sold at to be the market clearing price for only one buyer and would thus be higher than if we were trying to maximize profit while fixing a price across multiple buyers. Secondly, Alex is making a similar mistake that people make when they see oil companies posting huge revenue numbers. The absolute dollar amount is not the relevant factor, but rather what is their return on investment? In other words, it doesn't matter if a company makes 100 billion dollars in profit if their return on investment is equal to what they could have gotten from bonds (or whatever investment would be of comparable risk or less than the venture they engaged in) - they still didn't make an economic profit and aren't really doing that well. Similarly, if a company wins a 20 million dollar contract, that says nothing of their margins and what percentage of that is actually profit. Let's say that a company wins a contract and has a 10% profit on it. If it is a one million dollar contract that means that 100,000 of it is profit. But they haven't paid the bribe yet...so now it is only $50,000 dollars of profit or 5%...all of a sudden it may not even be clear if they have gotten anything out of the deal (which is what we would expect from our theory of rent-seeking).

Anyway, comments weren't open on the post over at MR so I figured I'd post about it over here...not that Alex is likely to read my blog anytime soon (which I should be greatful for since I'm sure he'd be able to hammer me more frequently than I him, plus I might feel obligated to proof read my posts then).

Catch ya all later.

Ugh

2006-02-17T13:32:00.000-05:00

I don't comment on my work on this blog, but I would like to say something about standard business practices. I worked in the private sector and if I didn't return phone calls to anyone, let alone someone with the government, I believe I would have faced serious consequences and if it was persistent I would have been fired. Apparently this area of the country doesn't do business like that, because I get many people who unapologetically simply refuse to acknowledge your phone calls, let alone return them. Apparently they think that if they don't respond you will just go away. I've got news for those people...it takes more time to avoid me then it does to respond to me. This has been a public service announcement.

It's like Christmas

2006-02-16T10:54:00.000-05:00

I have a new 400 page economic document I get to read through. It is just like Christmas. For those of you equally enthralled, here is the annual economic report of the President. I have to say that regardless of how you feel about the policies of this administration, the annual reports have been great primers for people interested in economics. They have been so good in fact, that I often wonder if the administration is actually reading the report it puts out. I can only hope that this year's report is of the same quality as previous years. I will let you know in about a week.

Funeral Services

2006-02-12T22:17:00.000-05:00

As some of you may know...I toyed with the idea of being a funeral director as my chosen profession for awhile. This got me involved in "necronomics" as it is sometimes called. Death and death services are fertile grounds for interesting study and I'm always suprised that they don't get more attention. In any case, this paper "State Casket Sales and Restrictions: A Pointless Undertaking?" goes to a fundamental point of pricing services. If somone is buying an end output or service, the relevant price is the total price and not the component price. I remember back when I was taking Antitrust classes arguing vigorously for extending monopoly power to secondary product lines if possible for some services and products. The reason is simple...the demand for the end product or service is whatever it is and thus the price that they are willing to pay is not determined by the pricing of the various components since most customers don't really care about the inputs into the good and only the output that they are receiving. If a company has monopoly in one input area but not another, it doesn't change the price that they can ultimately charge the consumer, but it might change the allocation of inputs by distorting the true rate of technical substitution and thus create inefficiencies in the production of the product. In any case...I think the paper is pretty interesting so I thought I'd share.

Sunday Night

2006-02-12T21:49:00.000-05:00

Well...it appears Dick Cheney shot a fellow hunter this weekend. Prepare for him to be the posterboy for gun control in the coming months.

In more interesting reading though...here is a paper from the University of Chicago that is pretty interesting. "Should We Aggregate Mental Hospitalization and Prison Population Rates in Empirical Research on the Relationship between Incarceration and Crime, Unemployment, Poverty, and Other Social Indicators? On the Continuity of Spatial Exclusion and Confinement in Twentieth Century United States (January 2006)"

Have fun reading.

On my way out

2006-02-07T11:37:00.000-05:00

I'm about to head out for appointments, but I thought I would share this. Via geekpress. It is safe for work, but if someone walks up behind you they might think you are a bit weird. Especially the bunny rabbit.

Why you would never want to face an economist in a Reality TV/Gameshow.

2006-02-06T15:38:00.000-05:00

Gladly, I'm not the only Economist watching a reality tv show. Glen over at Agorophilia is watching Survivor and has this post on the dangers of not knowing basic probability theory.

Hello

2006-02-06T11:38:00.000-05:00

Via Newmark's Door I was directed to this post at Tightly Wound. ...this conversation is hilarious. I think I will be checking in on this blog fairly regularly if this post is any indication of content.

"And since he is four and has my tendency toward hyperbolic overstatement, we have emotionally fraught rides home like this:

Boy: I wanted to see the doggie!
Me: You'll see him tomorrow.
Boy: Nooooo! I wanted to play with him today!
Me: I weep for your loss. (Sarcasm, the last refuge of the tired and edgy)
Pause. Boy doesn't get it, so he changes tactics.
Boy: I want to go to outer space!
Me: Well, when you grow up and get your college degree in science or engineering, maybe you can.
Boy: Nooooo! I want to go now!
Me: You can't go now.
Boy: Why?
Me: Because they don't make space suits in your size. Only grownup sizes.
Another pause, followed by a deep wailing cry:
Boy: First I can't play with the doggie, and now I can't blast off into outer space! THIS IS THE MOST DISAPPOINTING DAY EVER!
Preach it, brother.

Via geekpress...not all placebos are equal. Story here.

I'd also like to point out that the one game show that I'm currently watching and having a hard time not watching despite all its flaws is Beauty and the Geek. I don't know why I watch this show. I mean the women lie through their teeth and the guys...well the guys are pretty cool by my standards so the fact that they are considered geeks is a bit troublesome. (From this season my two favorites are already being ripped to shreds...one of them wearing a shirt saying "I put the stud in study" and the other writing in red paint that looks like blood on the wall of a room in an interior design competition.) Also, the girls as a general rule aren't really that attractive. So far each season (a total of two) there was only one girl that I really found myself interested in. First season was this girl. 2nd season is this girl.

I also have to wonder how many times they hit the contestants over the head and told them..."It is not a gameshow...refer to it as a "social experiment." A social experiment? It is a show that appeals to the lowest common denominator. It's main source of appeal is that everyone watching can find someone that they feel superior too. And watching I get more and more bitter. Exchanges like the one where one of the girls tells the guy who asks what she would do if one of them came up to her and asked her out responds by saying something like, if you approach with confidence then you could get somewhere. It is a lie. Take it from a guy who has approached many many women with quite a bit of confidence and well situated in the knowledge that I'm the best looking guy in the room. It doesn't matter how you approach the woman if you aren't insanely successful, i.e. wealthy, or over 6 feet tall with a moderately decent build.

Anyway...that's all I wanted to say today...catch ya all later.

Couple of news stories

2006-02-02T11:48:00.000-05:00

Kenya won't accept food supplement because it is used in dog food and is "culturally insensitive." Okay, here is all I have to say about that...do you think someone who is starving cares if the donation is "culturally insensitive?" Link here.

On another note...there is this article about Justice O'Conner with this nice little excerpt:

"In speeches she sometimes tells the story of a ranch hand from her childhood who got arrested so often after drinking that he ran for and got elected as justice of the peace so that he'd have easy access to jail."

I don't know why, but I find that story particularly appealing.

Woman serves 12 years and Appeals Court declares she comitted no crime.

2006-02-01T23:49:00.000-05:00

Via How Appealing there is this interesting court decision. I find several things fascinating about this decision.

It begins "Petitioner spent 12 years in prison for conduct that is not a crime." Okay, they have my attention. But then get this "because she had previously been convicted of three felonies and one gross misdemeanor - all fraud related - she was sentenced as a habitual criminal to five life sentences."

Okay, so let's even assume that the last conviction was legitimate, which based upon the unanimous decision and the rather simple and not very technical ruling it seems obvious it was not, but let's assume that it was, do 3 fraud related felonies and one gross misdemeanor warrant five life sentences? And if they do, then they surely warrant the death penalty. I find it implausible that we should sentence anyone to five life sentences for offenses that we would not be willing to put them to death over. Now, I'm not saying that fraud isn't a serious crime and that we should just look the other way and there shouldn't be punishments, even severe punishments, but I'm looking for some perspective here. Granted, I don't know the scope of her fraud...for all I know the other offenses were hundreds of millions of dollars stolen from the elderly, but somehow I doubt that was the case.

Another aspect of the case that I find so fascinating is that it seems like the lower courts were suffering from a problem with defining the money supply that economists have argued over for awhile. The woman convicted had a secure card and wrote checks that she did not have sufficient cash to cover them. The secure card guaranteed her checks, but she was convicted of writing bad checks. The point that the appeals court noted was that since the secure card guaranteed the checks, by definition they could not have been bad. Many years ago economists did not wish to include checks in the definition of the money supply, until a few rather sensible economists pointed out that even if there were no funds in the checking accounts that the person writing the check was still responsible for the payment of these debts and they did effectively increase the money supply. In any case, the lower courts clearly allowed the jury to ignore the law and convict someone on a crime they did not commit, and while I'm not sure if she has any legal recourse to renumeration, I would hope so because it seems like she should be able to get enough to never have to work again. Jay may have to comment on this, but I think despite the harm done to her, the fact that it was facilitated through a jury verdict and the fact that it would be hard to prove that the lower courts willfully ignored the law rather than just being so stupid as to not notice the word "credit" in the law, I don't think she has any legal standing to sue for damages in this instance, which in my estimation is a shame. Yes...I guess I'm becoming more liberal in my old age.

Just checking in part 55

2006-02-01T23:06:00.000-05:00

Jane Galt has an interesting post about some parts of the State of the Union that struck her.

"there were the Democrats, clapping joyously at the news that they'd voted down Social Security reform. They looked like adolescents mocking authority. Memo to Dems: if the American voter wanted sullen, rebellious adolescents in Congress, they would have sent their own, if for no other reason than to get them out of the basement. George Bush let them applaud their intransigence for a while, then said, "Now we still have a giant entitlement problem." This made the Dems look foolish enough. But, in keeping with the role of teen rebel who is not paying close attention to teacher, they kept applauding. Brilliant! Why didn't those Machiavellian Republicans think of positioning themselves as the party that's glad we have a gigantic, intractable entitlement problem? About halfway through the moment, some of the brighter senators seemed to realise that they were applauding something that they oughtn't to be. But by then, they apparently figured it was too late to back down, and the best course of action was to bull through as if they'd intended all along to celebrate multi-trillion dollar budget shortfalls."

For those of you who think Jane Galt is a Republican foot soldier, I will point to the other moment she thought was so entertaining.

"Then there was George Bush, with perhaps my favourite all time line in a SOTU: "These tax cuts are about to expire. I call upon you to do the responsible thing and make the tax cuts permament." (Paraphrase; emphasis mine)
What fantastic definition of the word "responsible" allows for this locution?
"Do the responsible thing, and teach your children how to smoke crack . . . ""Do the responsible thing, and call in sick to work today so you can go fly fishing . . . ""Do the responsible thing, and dump your aged parents in a substandard nursing home to far away for you to visit . . . ""Do the responsible thing, and take $50 out of the till . . . ""Do the responsible thing, and declare bankruptcy . . . "

So anyway...anyone not reading Jane Galt should start. Other than that I don't have much to say today except for a brief recommendation for movies.

Last weekend I watched "Nothing." It is on DVD now and is from the director of "Cube." It is about two guys who discover they have the ability to wish things that they really hate away. You can see immediately where it is going, but it is nonetheless a very nice comedic piece. I don't think it is the "think piece" that some of the commenters on IMDB are making it out to be, but I do think it is very well done. So go check it out.

Ugh

2006-01-26T09:47:00.000-05:00

Well, I was a bit of a bastard earlier because of my mood to some people, but I'm working on it. Maybe someday in 10 or 15 years I'll have made up the ground I lost since the beginning of the year, but until then you, my valued readers, will be treated with links to other more interesting and less bitterly depressed people.

First up, Kerry. In the last couple of days we have a couple of pretty good posts. One on that feeling that an econ nerd gets when they get to pontificate on the similarities between markets for bestiality pornography and shampoo and another linking to the ten most offensive board games, which have all made her amazon wishlist.

Also, here are some pretty pictures from the NFL Cheerleader Blog. GO CLEVELAND!!!

Later.

Dead and Breakfast

2006-01-25T13:50:00.000-05:00

Over the weekend I convinced Erin to watch Dead and Breakfast with me. She was not optimistic about it, but as usual I was right. It was very cool. Technically, not a zombie flick since they aren't supposed to be zombies, but still modeled after your usual zombie flicks it was in my estimation worth rewatching over and over again. I'm looking forward to watching the commentary tracks and would love to get the soundtrack (as a segway device scenes are broken up by a singing narrator playing songs commenting on the situations in the movie). I could listen to "I'm comin' to kill ya" over and over again. Also, don't stop listening to the soundtrack once the credits hit as you will be treated to a complete recap musically including some additional commentary in case you missed any of the plot points. 3 of the songs are on the website here.

During the movie we missed a line about no cell phone service that I caught the second time through. We commented on it at the time and it got me to wondering if communications technology is going to put an end to the isolationist form of horror movie. Once everyone has a cell phone (at this point if you are under 35 you do and how many horror movies are about people older than 35?) and coverage becomes complete, how will viewers be able to cope with the question of "why don't they just call someone?" Of course, there will always be the "supernatural" explanations that can be introduced to get writers out of this jam, but after awhile that just feels cheap and hackneyed. This seems like a serious problem for the horror genre which thrives on the idea that you might be safe if only you can find or make it to help or even just survive until help arrives . I forsee that horror movies will become even darker as we struggle with finding more ways to keep the characters from saving themselves. In some plots, there is no saving yourself and that is surely the most depressing solution to the problem. Just destroy the whole of the planet so that you are completely on your own, but then the horror movie will find no place to stop. I don't neccessarily have any solutions, or at least none that I want to throw out without seeing if I can turn them into a screenplay first, but I thought I would provide a brief comment on it.

Oh, and if you are interested in the idea of just getting rid of everyone else, I might recomment a comedy called "The Last Man" about a man who turns out to be one of only two men left on the planet and of course there is only one woman left. Hilarity and depression ensue.

Dear god, why is everything always so depressing.

2006-01-24T22:20:00.000-05:00

Via Marginal Revolution...Detroit fact of the day.

2006-01-24T22:04:00.000-05:00

An interesting editorial on the state of constitutional law over at the LA TIMES.

There is nothing else at this time.

Hotels

2006-01-23T23:57:00.000-05:00

Well, I haven't posted in awhile because I'm insanely stressed out about things I don't really want to go into, but I feel bad because I was finally becoming feasibly personable and now I find myself jumping down the throats of anyone who gets in my way. I also find myself heading back into a depths of depression that I thought were well behind me. It is not good and the worst part is that the uncertain nature of my circumstances is making matters even worse and with no end in sight I find myself unable to get the energy up to do much of anything. Thank god for Erin who keeps me running errands and makes sure that I am fed.

Anyway, I was in Ohio all last week in a hotel and tonight I am in a hotel in Michigan and while I have commented on this before to Jay, I don't believe it ever made my blog so I thought I'd throw this out there. The first reaction of any man who is in a hotel room alone is to check out the porn situation. It doesn't really matter if he has no intention at all of watching the porn, but he must check to see that it is there in case of an emergency or something. Yes...there are such things as porn emergencies. Some women I have spoken to don't understand this, but I'm sure that any men reading will understand exactly what I mean.

So anyway, everytime I'm in a hotel room the first thing I do is check out the porn situation. After several years of this, one day it occurred to me that I had never seen gay porn available in the on demand sections of the porn listings at the hotels. This struck me as particularly odd since I primarily stayed in large chains and it seemed like there was a huge market that wasn't being exploited and being a capitalist the thought of leaving any of the masses unexploited just leaves me feeling unsettled and a bit melancholy. Then I started thinking about the hotel chains that have specific locations that don't offer porn and how odd that was. I remember my anger at visiting a Hilton in Ohio that had no porn at all and thought that at the very least they should carry A Night in Paris. (Okay, some people I commented on that to thought it was in bad taste, but hey I'm not known for my judgment).

Well, as I have traveled more I have realized that it really is location specific. As I have traveled more I have discovered locations of virtually all the chains that offer straight porn, bi porn, lesbian porn, and gay porn. Of course that is irrelevant to me, because I would never actually watch such materials, but I thought I would let my friends in California know that I have discovered such locations and it has modified one of the questions to be asked in one of my research topics I was considering for graduate school on the economics of pornographic material. The question is no longer why not (which in many ways is an easier research proposition) but rather why not more? Please, no hints...I'd hate to give credit in a research paper to an anonymously commenter from a blog. That would be embarrassing.

Just Checking In

2006-01-10T22:15:00.000-05:00

I thought I would link to this post over at Cafe Hayek and post his eloquent response to Biden's insinuations about the "real world" during the Alito hearings.

Senator, I, too, believe that law is a product exclusively of the real world and should not be divorced from it. I agree with Oliver Wendell Holmes’s observation that law is no “brooding omnipresence.” But Senator, we must be careful about what we take to be the real world. The real world is not limited to the here and now; it’s not limited to the plaintiff and defendant in whatever case happens to be in front of the court. It’s not limited to the people we can see and hear standing before us or shouting behind us.
The real world exists through time and vast space. It includes millions of people whose names and faces we don’t know and will never encounter – but each of whom is as real as you and me. The fact that we – you and me – don’t see these persons and don’t know them doesn’t make them unreal or less-real than the people we do see and hear and touch and smell in our courtrooms and in the lobbies of our legislative halls.
So let’s say we have a statute aimed at preventing employment discrimination against disabled people. I ask: Which disabled people? And I answer: all disabled people. Surely being a man committed to the real world you understand that this country contains many more disabled people beyond the one who sues a company under the statute. If the court grants relief to the plaintiff – the disabled worker who filed the suit demanding (say) that his employer build a special elevator just for his use – that real-world disabled worker might well be helped. But what if the consequence of applying the statute in this way makes it less likely that disabled people will be hired in the future and by other companies?
I realize, Senator, that judges’ scope for making policy decisions is far narrower than that enjoyed by legislators. But please, Senator, don’t insult me or the audience listening to this political spectacle by insinuating that only persons, such as yourself, who focus only on the anecdote, only on a handful of identifiable persons, have a monopoly on caring about the real world. Don’t suggest that those of us who care about rules – who understand that rules are to be judged by their performance over time and space rather than by how they work in any one instance – are less concerned about the real-world than you are.
Indeed, Senator, because I understand that statutes and legal rulings have effects far beyond those which are seen, I dare say that I am more aware of the real-world than are those – such as you, Senator? – who typically judge a rule to be good or bad based exclusively upon how it affects a single or a few identifiable persons.
Senator Biden, the issue isn't whether or not the real world matters. We all agree that it does. What separates you and me, Senator, is that I don’t ignore that part of the real-world that is less visible than that relatively small part that attracts the attention of politicians and the press.

Don't feel much like talking today, so just quotes

2006-01-03T12:39:00.000-05:00

From the 40 year old Virgin...Hilarious movie in case you were wondering.

Cal: Oh, man, I had a weekend.
Andy Stitzer: Yeah?
Cal: We went to Tijuana, Mexico, you know? And we thought it would be fun, you know, to go to a show. Everybody says you gotta check out one of these shows. And... it's a woman fuckin' a horse. We get there and we think it's gonna be awesome and... it is not as cool as it sounds like it's gonna be. It's kinda gross.
Andy Stitzer: Yeah.
Cal: You think "A woman fuckin' a horse" and you get there and... it's a woman fucking a horse.
Andy Stitzer: Yeah.
Cal: It was really giving it to her. And you know what? To be honest I just felt bad for her, we all just felt bad for her.
Andy Stitzer: Yeah.
Cal: I kinda felt bad for the horse!
Andy Stitzer: Wow, that's something.

Next one

Cal: You know what's a fun game? Take 3 Excedrin PM's and see if you can whack off before you fall asleep. You always win, that's the best part about the game.

"Andromeda" (2000)
Tyr Anasazi: I wish you would stop looking for beauty in things that want to kill us.

Okay...

Have a good one.

Hey again

2005-12-29T11:45:00.000-05:00

I'm back in Michigan, believe it or not. I survived. Well physically. It will take several weeks to figure out how much of my soul remains in tact from the family visit.

Via Newmark's door, P.J. O'Rourke: "You see, the real reason I became a communist was to impress girls. Back then, all the pretty ones were revolutionaries. One of the things that's gone wrong for the Left is that their girls just aren't cute any more."

Via Agrophilia, this gem: "Here’s another example of how Wal-Mart is ruining America. When shopping there last week, I would occasionally see an item and think, “Hey, that would be a really great gift for So-and-So... aw man, it’s too cheap! I’ll have to find another gift to give with it! DAMN YOU, WAL-MART!”

Okay, I got deadlines tomorrow so that's all for now.

Public Apology

2005-12-27T12:35:00.000-05:00

Well, I am in Rock Island and will be for another day before heading back to Michigan. I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to Erin for not getting to talk to her for longer and more often while I've been out here. It's a bit hard to talk with family around...especially family that never stops talking. In fact, one particular family member is ranting right now. I think I finally understand where my tendency to narrate my actions and to never shut up comes from and it is not only very scary but also very annoying.

In other news, Senator Kennedy cited an incident regarding the Bush administration sending agents to investigate a student for checking out Mao Tse-Tsung's "Little Red Book" (forget the fact that Kennedy actually said that it was "Mao Tse-Tsung's Communist Manifesto") in an editorial pointing to how out of line the administration is. Well, it turns out that the story was a complete hoax, see here. And of course, Kennedy doesn't think that makes a difference. "Laura Capps, a Kennedy spokeswoman, said last night that the senator cited ''public reports" in his opinion piece. Even if the assertion was a hoax, she said, it did not detract from Kennedy's broader point that the Bush administration has gone too far in engaging in surveillance."

Also, I'd like to point to this Bloomberg piece on the campaign against Wal-mart. I tried to avoid politics while visiting home this year, but the subject of Wal-mart did come up and the salient point from the article, the point that I made in the arguments with family, was that there are no shortage of people clamoring to get jobs at Walmart. 8000 applicants for 525 jobs in Glendale, AZ. People want to work at Walmart, despite all of their "horrible" labor practices. The horrible labor practices that my mother and I both looked at each other and said, "Horrible? Are you kidding?" It seems like those of us who have worked in the real world and who have had to engage in jobs at the lower end of the socioeconomic spectrum are the ones who understand these practices aren't that horrible. In other words, we are those 7500 applicants who weren't able to get jobs there and suffered because another Wal-mart couldn't be built because people who can afford to shop elsewhere and who have plenty of job opportunities stopped it from being built. As so many people have said before, those who try to stop Wal-mart from entering an area or to change their business practices are harming the people they claim to be looking out for. I find it so aggravating.

Detroit, MI is the 56th most literate city? That is one scary thought. Check out the methodology and you might see why it is a completely meaningless list.

The NYTimes has this article on the Louisianna cleanup and the discrepancy between the private sector cleanup effort vs the government cleanup effort. Yeah, the government should be handling evacuations when they can't even handle the cleanup afterwards.

I would also like to recommend this Cafe Hayek post on "tender chicken."

Okay, for now I'm going to call it quits. Probably won't be able to post again until the weekend, but have fun all.

King Kong

2005-12-20T10:18:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I saw King Kong on Sunday...the remake obviously. I saw the original many years ago. The remake made me want to go back and see the original again. On the whole I liked the remake quite a bit, but I did feel a little bit angry about some of the themes and messages that I don't remember feeling with the original (perhaps because I was too young to recognize it).

King Kong is as always the sympathetic character, not a mere monster to be feared or exploited as is done by all the world in the fictional universe with the exception of our leading lady. This portrayal is incomplete though. King Kong is an animal. He acts without regard for the consequences of his actions. He is big and brutish and ill tempered. He constantly feels the need to thump his chest and get into fights rather than just getting away from the fight which it seems he could easily do against many of the creatures and people in the movie. He is in most senses just the thug you run into at the bar on a Friday night who has to prove his worth by picking fights to impress the girls. And that bring me to the point of resentment. Every girl who claims that those thugs in the bars don't appeal to them gets all misty eyed when Kong is attacked by the military. The only problem is, Kong destroyed the city looking for a girl. He is too violent to not be dealt with. And this is why I feel a personal sense of anger, not toward the movie which I think accurately portrays how women respond to men (it isn't until she has exhausted her chances with Kong that the sensitive writer becomes a viable option), but rather towards the reality that it portrays.

Despite their statements that women don't like the thugish bad boy brawlers, their actions invariably speak to the contrary. When a guy gets kicked out of a bar for starting a fight, a beautiful woman is invariably grabbing his coat and following him out. That is the story of King Kong. It's about the guy who is a jerk and "nice" guys instinctively recognize that we aren't "supposed" to behave that way, but he gets the women anyway. Kong also has some insight into why those human thugs do so well with women. Women like to think that they see something deeper and special about them that noone else does. Women like to think they have some special insight. The problem is that they really don't. Often the man is just a possessive animal like Kong and needs to be put down just like Kong.

I found myself toward the end of the movie rooting for Kong's demise and I wondered why I felt any sympathy for him at all. He was from the land that time forgot and thrust into a modern world in the same way that those brutish men we run into daily seem to be anachronistic, born a couple centuries too late. This is not sufficient reason to give them a pass and it isn't sufficient reason to give Kong a pass either.

Still, I like the movie which was a suprise to me. I didn't like any of the Lord of the Rings movies which Jackson did. I was always a fan of his earlier work...think Heavenly Creatures or Meet the Feebles. On that note I would like to encourage the rental of those two movies by providing some quotes

From Heavenly Creatures

All the best people have bad chests and bone diseases. It's all frightfully romantic.

She is most unreasonable. Why could not mother die? Dozens of people are dying all the time, thousands, so why not mother? And father too.

We have decided how sad it is for others that they cannot appreciate our genius.

Pauline Parker: Oh, I wish James Mason would do a religious picture! He'd be perfect as Jesus! Juliet Hulme: Daddy says the Bible's a load of bunkum!
Pauline Parker: But we're all going to heaven?
Juliet Hulme: I'M not! I'M going to The Fourth World... it's sort of like heaven. Only better, because there aren't any Christians!

From IMDB here is a brief synopsis: Based on the true story of Juliet Hulme and Pauline Parker, two close friends who share a love of fantasy and literature, who conspire to kill Pauline's mother when she tries to end the girls' intense and obsessive relationship.

As for Meet the Feebles...as the coverbox says, it's the muppets on crack.

Price Fixing with prices at or below the cost of production?

2005-12-12T13:30:00.000-05:00

So I was just randomly reading this article from Computerworld and was trying to figure out how there could be price fixing as indicated when I finally got to the last line of the article. "The computer companies and the U.S. government maintain that strong DRAM prices hurt business, despite the fact most DRAM makers posted heavy losses during the year in question, 2001, and DRAM prices remained below or near the cost of production for most of the year. "

Okay...wait a second. They ended up pleading guilty despite the fact that their prices just barely, if at all, covered the cost of production for most of the year and they posted heavy losses for the year.

If we go to the Department of Justice we get the following link.

"The charged combination and conspiracy consisted of a continuing agreement, understanding, and concert of action among the defendants and their coconspirators, the substantial terms of which were to agree to fix the prices for DRAM to be sold to certain OEMs. "

But I'm still lost. These companies acted in a concerted effort to sell DRAM at certain prices to SPECIFIC OEM's? Let's assume that this is true. If it is then there is the opportunity for arbitrage to sort things out. A quick internet search doesn't reveal this as being the case. So now I'm fascinated. I will admit I am generally skeptical of Antitrust claims. Most of the "landmark" Antitrust cases of been proven in subsequent years to be complete bunk to anyone with even a cursory understanding of economics. Also, very little weight is ever given to the idea of a "cost saving cartel." The Antitrust suit against vitamin companies in the 90's had the perverse effect of increasing prices once the "cartel" was disbanded. So let's hypothesize the arbitrage is impossible for whatever reason. Then it looks like we simply have a case of price discrimination based upon willingness and ability to pay. From an economic perspective that isn't really a bad thing. In fact, marketed properly I'm sure that many people would support the idea. If I told you that we were going to charge less to smaller companies because they can't afford to pay as much and we like to encourage small businesses, I'm sure that many antitrust advocates would applaud the decision.

I would have liked to have seen this go to court. It still might as there are other manufacturers being investigated. I imagine that based upon the history of Antitrust cases in the U.S. that they were worried that a prolonged legal battle would just drain resources and even if they did nothing wrong they might still lose because of how muddled the Antitrust laws are with regard to economic reasoning.

In other economic news, here is a slate article from Landsburg on different methods of establishing wage differentials based upon the decision to wait an additional year to have a child.

For those of you interested in the math, here is the article that Landsburg is writing about.

This paper also from Virginia makes mention of something I've complained about for a long time. The sequence in A Beautiful Mind where John Nash supposedly comes up with his "Nash Equilibrium" is not in fact a Nash Equilibrium. The paper is entitled "Participation Games: Market Entry, Coordination, and the Beautiful Blonde."

Okay...time for me to get back to work.

New Header

2005-12-08T13:04:00.000-05:00

Well, Erin will be happy. She suggested my new header, however so that my old one remains immortalized I will include it in this post. "Women are alot like buses, sooner or later you start to think you'd rather have a car." - Unknown.

The new one is more intellectual...or maybe less...who knows, but it's still good.

Lawyers need math too

2005-11-30T11:12:00.000-05:00

The Volokh Conspiracy has an interesting recent post about a court attempting to decide whether the distance from a school should be measured in walking distance or "as the crow flies." A man convicted of selling drugs to an undercover cop will receive a harsher punishment due to a law requiring tougher penalties if drugs are sold within 1000 feet of a school. The defense attorneys argued that buildings were in the way and that the walking distance should be used since "crows do not sell drugs."

Now, I think that there are a few interesting points to be made about this case, but the question I want to ask is whether or not their decision made sense. They argued that the intent of the law was clearly to create a buffer zone and was designed because of the prevalence of drug activity within a 2 block radius of schools. The radius element was something that the court decision focused in on. However, if we are looking at intent then we should not be focusing on the radius but rather the idea that the law was meant to create a buffer zone. If buildings obstruct part of the path to the school grounds then they constitute an additional obstacle and act as a buffer and therefore I am hard pressed to see how we can not include this obstacle in our calculation of the distance to the school. Apparently the overwhelming precedent is that these things should be measured "as the crow flies" but I find the arguments presented in the opinion uncompelling. Maybe it's because I'm not a lawyer, but I would have found the defendent's argument rather compelling.

Titles are hard.

2005-11-28T17:37:00.000-05:00

So I want to direct everyone over to Voxbaby and this link about the Federal Brain Drain. Please, this is not an excuse to make Bush administration jokes.

I have to say that I don't think the Bush administrations attempts to move away from the General Schedule Pay System will help things. Despite the rhetoric, there is quite a bit of room for rewarding GS employees monetarily both through bonuses and performance related step increases. What is the solution? Well there are basically two easily identifiable routes. 1. Become more efficient and get the job done with fewer employees. This would be more effective if we reduced the complexity of government regulations (like for example the tax code) as it would make administration easier and it would also be more effective if we decreased both the size and scope of government in general as there would be less positions that needed to be filled. 2. The alternative is to increase pay and benefits to induce more people to work for the federal government.

And now for some humor.

Here is an Emo Philips article where he interviews himself.

Also by Emo Philips and voted the number one religion joke over at Ship of Fools here is a great one.

"Iwas walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump.
I ran over and said: "Stop. Don't do it."

"Why shouldn't I?" he asked.

"Well, there's so much to live for!"

"Like what?"

"Are you religious?"

He said, "Yes."

I said, "Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

"Christian."

"Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

"Protestant."

"Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

"Baptist."

"Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

"Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

"Reformed Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

He said: "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

I said: "Die, heretic scum," and pushed him off.

Economist Articles

2005-11-23T16:23:00.000-05:00

As usual, the online version of the economist has some pretty interesting articles.

On Crime in Britain. Specifically on the practices of mugging and how it has changed over time. "These days, muggers are distinguished by their youth. Home Office research in 2003 showed that 71% of muggers were under the age of 21, while 17% were under 16. Part of the explanation, police officers reckon, is that mugging is a short step from many of the things that teenage louts get up to anyway, like playground bullying and menacing people who stray into their neighbourhoods. But teenagers have not just swelled the ranks of muggers; they have also changed the nature of the crime.
Today's muggers are more discerning in their choice of victims and goods. Three-quarters of their victims are men, which is novel: a large study of street robbery in 1987 found that 57% of victims were women. Young muggers look down on drug-addled practitioners, generally in their early 20s, who go after softer targets and will steal anything. Simon Holdaway, who has interviewed young robbers in Sheffield, finds that they occasionally beat up their elders.
“Many of these robbers are funding a lifestyle, not a drug habit,” says Mr Pountain. Although poor, they are driven not by need but by aspiration and desire—for the latest gadget, or for something that can be used to finance its purchase. Engels might have regarded that as a sign of progress. "

Another article on GM's woes.

Rent

2005-11-23T15:40:00.000-05:00

I thought this review of the movie version of the stage musical Rent was pretty interesting. Some of my favorite excerpts:

"Based in part on La Bohème — you know, that famous opera by Baz Luhrmann — Rent observes 525,600 minutes in the lives of the healthiest-looking, most highly functional junkies, strippers, AIDS patients and starving artists who populate the cold-water flats of New York City’s Lower East Side, circa 1989."

"The characters in Rent suffer for their art — we never really find out if any of them are actually talented, but we’re asked to believe that they’re all brilliant — and they suffer in other ways, too. The whole movie is like a paean to the nobility of suffering. Mark’s ex-girlfriend, the aforementioned artist Maureen (Idina Menzel), has recently ditched him for an attorney named Joanne (Tracie Thoms). Roger and Collins are both HIV-positive — something which, in Roger’s case, becomes fodder for a song, “I Should Tell You.” Fortunately for Roger, the object of his desire, the beautiful but tragic Mimi (Rosario Dawson), is HIV-positive herself — and a junkie and a stripper to boot, which I suppose makes her the winner of the Alphabet City triple crown. And just to make sure he has all his bases covered, Larson throws in one interracial lesbian engagement party, a wisdom-spouting homeless prophet, and a Latino, cross-dressing street performer unsubtly named Angel (Wilson Jermaine Heredia). No oppressed minority or special-interest group is left unturned (save perhaps for paraplegic albino hermaphrodites). Was Larson really hoping to have a career on Broadway, or was that just going to be his springboard into politics?"

"For the considerably cheaper price of a movie ticket, new audiences can now be showered with such meaningless, up-with-people aphorisms as “No day but today,” “Take me for what I am” and “How about love?” They can be reminded that, no matter how grim things get, they’ll work themselves out for the best (or how, failing that, they’ll become martyrs who inspire all their friends to live their lives to the fullest). And they can rest assured that by swallowing this hooey, they are somehow expressing their own individuality, just like all the lemmings in their Che Guevara T-shirts. Rent wants to teach the world to sing all right, but only if the world buys a Coca-Cola first. "

Jay, Keri, and I saw Rent in Kalamazoo back in January of this year and I have to say, I'm glad the woman playing Maureen was hot because it enabled me to forgive alot.

2005-11-23T14:29:00.000-05:00

Your Birthdate: January 14

You work well with others. That is, you're good at getting them to do work for you.
It's true that you get by on your charm. But so what? You make people happy!
You're dynamic, clever, and funny. And people like to have you around.
But you're so restless, they better not expect you to stay around for long.

Your strength: Your superstar charisma

Your weakness: Commitment means nothing to you

Your power color: Fuchsia

Your power symbol: Diamond

Your power month: May

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Thanks to Jay at a Random Walk for the link. I have to say that anyone who has ever met me knows charisma is not my thing. I'm the guy who gets people in the graduate programs at Harvard to threaten his physical safety within minutes of conversation. Plus, you would think that a guy with that much charisma would have been able to get a date before he was 25. I'm just saying.

Friday? Really?

2005-11-18T15:31:00.000-05:00

It feels like a Saturday from "back in the day" when I used to work on Saturdays. Almost everyone is gone. I'm listening to my radio without a headset while typing up reports. My desk is a mess. But no...it's Friday. Huh. I wonder what that is all about. Anyway, here are some links for ya all.

For those of you who don't live in Detroit, here is an economist article on how Kwame made race an issue to win the mayor's race.

Here is an economist article on Delaware Pumpkin hurling.

Scores is being "probed" about overcharging lap dance customers. Thank god I never found one of those in my partying days because a $241,000 tab would definitely not have helped me in getting out of debt.

Via geekpress the real story of the 1984 commercial.

We should go out and rent Night of the Lemurs to celebrate the naming of a Lemur species being named after John Cleese. See here.

There ya all go. Now get back to work no matter what day it is.

I'm still working on a tagline

2005-11-14T21:23:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone...time for me to update the masses on the news they have already heard. Starting with the Kalamazoo, MI promise to pay tuition for all its students. Article here. I have to step back and ask whether this should be viewed as a good thing or not. It doesn't appear that there is any qualifier for the funding and it also doesn't specify whether or not there is a cap on the amount, but it seems like a pretty simple way to increase the amount of time people spend in college (I'm sure anyone who knows me already knows I believe American's are vastly overeducated and that increased funding of higher education is simply a waste of resources...anyone who wants to throw out arguments about why we should have be striving to increase education levels of the populace should check out E.G. West's research on the topic before they waste my time) and I can't help but think that this act of altruism will provide some extremely interesting data in the long run. I would expect that it will increase the number of low wage manual labor establishments that operate in that area since the annoynomous funding will subsidize the company and allow them to pay less. I also doubt it will have any effect on the number of college students from Kalamazoo who actually GRADUATE college. The ones who have the work ethic to put themselves through college and the capacity to do the work are already putting themselves through college and doing it. Bottom line, as an economist I'll be fascinated by the data this provides in the long run but I also think this is a waste of resources.

Hollywood unions are mad because of product placement in tv and movies. This seems like another instance where the unions are at odds with the customers of the products. I think most viewers are pretty clear that they prefer strategic product placement to two minutes of commercials every 8 minutes. My favorite part is at the end of the article when they state that if they can't convince the producers to do what they want that they will go try and get the government to force them to do what they want.

WWE's Eddie Guerrero was found dead in his hotel. I heard this several times in the car today but they never said what from. Apparently we don't know yet and won't for awhile, but I'd like to ask newscasters to simply say that someone was found dead from "unknown causes" if that is the case rather than have us sit there going "what the hell did he die from?" Probably not a really big deal, but one of my pet peeves.

Update

2005-11-07T17:17:00.000-05:00

So my girlfriend has been prodding me to update my blog. It leads me to wonder if she actually listens to me when we talk and if the reason she is asking me to update it is so that she can catch up on what she didn't listen to while I was talking. Okay, maybe I'm being paranoid.

In any case, in deference to her I am looking for a new tagline for my blog. "Women are alot like buses, sooner or later you start to think you'd rather have a car" is still a brilliant line, but I'm seeking something else so keep your eyes open for a monumental change to my header. Not sure when it will come, but mark my words...It Will Come.

For Halloween weekend Erin and I went to a William Castle triple feature which was tons of fun. This past weekend we went to Planet Ant to see a Horror/Comedy (more emphasis on the horror than the comedy) called "The Weekend." It was great. We are actually thinking about going back to see it again since it is an original production and we may never get to see it again if we don't. I'm thinking about emailing them to suggest that they videotape their performances and see if there is a market to sell the tapes. I'm sure it wouldn't be as good on tape, but it is a shame to think I won't be able to view this play in 20 years in all its comic beauty.

Okay, so now it is time for some links. The amount of thought that has to go into this project to label waste isolation plants is pretty interesting.

Here we have the The Church and the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

I think Glen over at Agorophilia (who is also responsible for directing us to the link above) has made a pretty good point regarding the Target policy on pharmacists selling contraceptives.

I'm sorry I missed the Live West Wing Debate. I assumed the worst, and it appears I may have been wrong. Marie...don't suppose you taped it?

Okay, I have to get going, but I hope everyone is doing well and I hope my English major girlfriend doesn't expect me to be eloquent or witty or even grammatically correct because that is just not what I'm all about. I'm with Jason...the ends of sentences are what prepositions are for. I'm part of the anthropological linguistics school of grammer and anyone interested in arguing with Language mavens should check out Steven Pinker's work on the subject. Of course, if you are arguing with your girlfriend I suppose you should just assume that you are going to lose the argument. Still, if she's not around I'll throw down with the rest of you elitist bastards. (Just kidding sweetness)

Ooooh, Snaps.

2005-10-15T17:50:00.000-05:00

I'm listening to past Supreme Court Oral Arguments on C-Span radio (Lawrence & Garner v Texas 2003) and one of the Justices asked if this was a state law in Texas in the 1830's. The lawyer responded, "I don't think Texas was a state in the 1830's." Texas became a state in 1845.

I love those little stabs during Supreme Court Oral Arguments. My favorite I used in a passage for a History of Women in America paper I wrote during college. During oral argument in the Roe case the Texas attorney stated that the woman makes her choice to have the child at the time of conception, which caused one Justice to respond "maybe she makes her choice when she decides to live in the state of Texas."

The girl I'm seeing doesn't find these exchanges that interesting so I'm relegated to sharing them with my small readership.

Update

2005-10-15T16:51:00.000-05:00

Hey all,

Here's an AP background story on Miers.

Here is a story on plans to turn Paradise Lost into a major Hollywood Motion Picture (supposedly staying true to Milton's vision).

Also, I haven't been able to find out who said it yet, but while listening to coverage of the anniversary of the million man march on C-Span radio yesterday, one speaker got up and said that blacks would never be free until ALL white's are "exterminated." Yes, that was the word he used. C-Span radio only mentions who is speaking sporadically and I missed the beginning of his speach, but if anyone else heard it and can give me a name I'd appreciate it. It had to be someone prominant to have gotten a speaker role which is part of why I'm disturbed that I haven't found any articles on the statement. I will say that the statement was met with only moderate applause, which I'm not really sure if I should be happy about or not, and that the speaker who followed him (I didn't catch the name or I'd give him some credit) immediately distanced himself from the comments, as did Tavis Smiley who spoke some time later.

Thanks.

Josh's Relationship Tip of the Day

2005-10-06T12:39:00.000-05:00

If you are walking down the street with the girl you are dating and she catches you checking out a jogger as she goes running by and asks you "did you just check her out?" the answer is no regardless of how obvious it was...and if she responds "but you are here with me" the correct response is NOT "but I already checked you out."

See, these are the kinds of pointers you just don't get from reading self help dating books.

I'm Jayne? Really?

2005-10-06T10:09:00.000-05:00

You scored as Jayne Cobb. The Mercenary. You are in this for the money, plain as that. You like things simple that way, but mainly as anything else confuses you. You get the job done, and don't care what people think. Not as long as you get paid anyway.

Jayne Cobb

88%

Hoban 'Wash' Washburne

88%

Zoe Alleyne Washburne

81%

The Operative

81%

River Tam

63%

Kaylee Frye

50%

Simon Tam

31%

Inara Serra

25%

Shepherd Derrial Book

25%

Capt. Mal Reynolds

25%

Which Serenity character are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Stolen Post

2005-10-06T01:26:00.000-05:00

Since my readership is around 20 or 30 and Cafe Hayek's readership has got to be at least twice that (I kid because I love) I hope they won't mind me not merely linking back to this post, but also including it in it's entirety since so many of my friends have an aversion to actually clicking links to read what I am referencing. The post is short otherwise I'd try to steal only a small portion and make you all go back and read the rest, but unfortuneatly they are much to succint for me to cut much of anything. I will encourage everyone to check the blog out on a regular basis however for a good read that will make many of my classically liberal friends happy and my modern liberal friends outraged. Anyway, here is the post:

"I learned today, listening to this NPR interview of David Rakoff, that the U.S. Department of Justice asks people seeking to become citizens of the United States "What is the most important right granted to United States citizens?" (See also here.) The answer is "The right to vote."

Not the right to be free from arbitrary arrest and to the writ of habeas corpus; not the right to acquire, use, transfer, and be secure in the possession of property; not freedom of speech; not the right to a trial by jury – no. The right to vote. The right to yank a lever in a booth on intermittent occasions, along with thousands or millions of other people, the collective outcome of which is the election of a handful of power-mad, glib dissemblers who specialize in picking each of our pockets, transferring the booty to special-interest groups, and persuading us that we are strengthened, enriched, and raised to glory by it all.

Some right."

Miers nomination

2005-10-05T15:41:00.000-05:00

Commentary over at Findlaw about the Mier nomination.

From his piece:

After all, the Supreme Court isn't simply an appellate court of last resort, it's a political institution. Justice Felix Frankfurter put it well in a 1957 law review article: "One is entitled to say without qualification that the correlation between prior judicial experience and fitness for the Supreme Court is zero."

Frankfurter, who was himself appointed to the Court without prior judicial experience, continued: "The significance of the greatest among the justices who had such experience, Holmes and Cardozo, derived not from that judicial experience but from the fact that they were Holmes and Cardozo. They were thinkers, and more particularly, legal philosophers."

Among the "great" Supreme Court justices who didn't have prior judicial experience were venerated Marbury v. Madison author John Marshall, the prolific Joseph Story, and other bright lights. They included Louis D. Brandeis, originator of the famously well-researched "Brandeis brief," Harlan Fiske Stone, William O. Douglas, Felix Frankfurter, and Earl Warren.

Brandeis and Frankfurter are credited with crafting landmark First Amendment decisions; Warren is responsible for setting the tone for the entire era that bears his name. So much for the claim that non-judges can't succeed on the Court . . .

Off the Record?

2005-10-04T19:07:00.000-05:00

Okay...so I'm driving along listening to C-Span radio and a democrat from the House is giving a speech at some group (I missed the beginning so I don't know what the group was). He proceeds to say, "I was over in Iraq and I asked one of the Generals, off the record, what he thought about..." This congressman than proceeded to tell us what the General said. Now I don't really care one way or the other about the specific text of what was said, but I have to ask how someone can sit there with a straight face and tell you they asked someone something off the record and then proceed to tell you what they said without you standing up and calling them an idiot. If you are going to break your word that something is "off the record" then don't tell people when you are being broadcast that you were told it off the record. These are the people we have in office. Ugh.

2005-10-04T08:18:00.000-05:00

A few links...

From Forbes:

"U.S. scientists and their supporters tend to assume biomedical research is threatened by know-nothings on religious crusades. But as the Canadian law illustrates, the long-term threat to genetic research comes less from the religious right than from the secular left. Canada's law forbids all sorts of genetic manipulations, many of them currently theoretical. It's a crime, for instance, to alter inheritable genes.

And the law has provisions the fabled religious right never even talks about. It's a crime to pay a surrogate mother or to make or accept payment for arranging a surrogate. It's a crime to pay egg or sperm donors anything more than "receipted expenses," like taxi fares. Since eggs are used not just in fertility treatments but in research, this prohibition stifles both."

Singing Dolphins from Hitchhiker's Guide better watch out.

I have to comment. I don't like the economist.com's new layout. I preferred the old one. Yeah I know...I'm a traditionalist.

Meat Loaf Lyrics

2005-10-03T21:51:00.000-05:00

I have to say...if you go to a Meatloaf concert with a woman be careful. It's amazing how many Meatloaf "love songs" will get you in trouble if the girl identifies your singing them with her.

That being said, I had a good time at the concert. Turns out it was the Meat's birthday. Third year in a row he's been in Detroit on his birthday. He had surgery recently and the sound system was a little screwed up so you could tell he was having some vocal problems, but he still delivers quite a performance. He also played a new song from the new collaboration he is working on with Jim Steinman...Bat Out of Hell 3. It was a paranthesis title as they are so fond of. I believe the title is supposed to be "If it Ain't Broke (Break it)". Anyway, here are some of my favorite MeatLoaf Lines for all of you all.

Love her for both of us.
"But if you give me your girl, and then you give me your trust
And if you give me till the end of the night
I’m gonna love her for both of us"

More than You Deserve
"When I saw you hanging round the truck stop, shining like an angel in the night
And when I saw you crying like a baby, I knew you’d have to be my wife

Then I saw you making love to my best friend, I didn’t know whatever to say
I saw you making love to my best friend
So I looked him right in his eyes and I said - listen boy

Won’t you take some more, it’s what you came for
And don’t mind me, I won’t throw you no curves
Have yourself a ball with my good woman
Won’t you take some more boy, it’s more than you deserve"

Nowhere Fast
"You and me we’re goin’ nowhere slowly and we gotta get away from the past
There’s nothin’ wrong with goin’ nowhere baby
But we should be goin’ nowhere fast
Everybody’s goin’ nowhere slowly
They’re only fighting for the chance to be last
There’s nothin’ wrong with goin’ nowhere baby
But we should be goin’ nowhere fast"

Two Out of Three Ain't Bad

"There’s only one girl that I will ever love
And that was so many years ago
And though I know I’ll never get her out of my heart
She never loved me back
Ooh I know
I remember how she left me on a stormy night
She kissed me and got out of our bed
And though I pleaded and I begged her not to walk out that door
She packed her bags and turned right away

And she kept on telling me
She kept on telling me
She kept on telling me
I want you
I need you
But there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you
Now don’t be sad
’cause two out of three ain’t bad
I want you
I need you
But there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you
Now don’t be sad
’cause two out of three ain’t bad"

Bad Attitude

"Well there are winners and outlaws and leaders and lovers
Behind every man in the news
And one thing I know is behind everyone there’s a boy who had nothin’ to lose
Behind every man who has somethin’ to say
There’s a boy who had nothin’ to prove
An’ every hero was once, every villain was once just a boy with a bad attitude"

Hot Summer Nights

"You took the words right out of my mouth
it must have been while you were kissing me,
yeah you took the words right out of my mouth
cause I swear it's true
I was just about to say I love you"

bad weekend...bad

2005-09-27T14:23:00.000-05:00

Well,

I lost my wallet, cell phone, and glasses on the weekend. I'm pretty much useless and unable to function with no access to money, sight, or calling anyone I know. That being said, there was some good news. Erin swooped in to rescue me and took me out on Sunday to buy me glasses so I could see and to make sure I had enough food until I get an I.D. so I can write a check or get a credit card so I actually have access to my own money. She is also taking me to see Meatloaf tonight. In tribute to tonight's Meatloaf concert please enjoy the following lyrical prose:

Wasted Youth
Wasted Youth
I remember everything!
I remember everything little thing, as if it happened yesterday
I was barely seventeen,
and I once killed a boy with a Fender Guitar
I don't remember if it was a Telecaster or a Stratocaster
But I do remember that it had a heart of chrome, and a voice like a horny angel
I don't remember if it was a Telecaster or a Stratocaster
But I do remember that it wasn't at all easy
It required the perfect combanation of the right power chords
And the percise angel from which to strike!
The guitar bled for about a week afterwords
And the blood was zoot, dark and rich, like wild berrys
The blood of the guitar was Chuck Berry red
The guitar bled for about a week afterwords
But it rung out beautifly
And I was able to play notes that I had never even heard before
So I took my guitarAnd I smashed it aganist the wall
I smashed it aganist the floor
I smashed it aganist the body of a varisty cheerleader
Smashed it aganist the hood of a car
Smasned it aganist a 1981 Harley-Davaidson
The Harley howled in pain
The guitar howled in heat
And I ran up the stairs to my parents bedroom
Mommy and Daddy were sleeping in the moonlight
Slowly I opened the door
Creeping in the shadows right up to the foot of their bed
I raised the guitar high above my head
And just as I was about to bring the guitar crashing down upon the center of the bed
My father woke up, screaming "STOP!"
"Wait a minute.
Stop it boy.
What do you think your doing?"
"That's no way to treat an expensive musical instrument"
And I said, "God Damn It daddy,"
"You know I love you,
But you've got a hell of a lot to learn about Rock n' Roll"

That being said, my weekend was not as harsh or cruel as it could have been thanks to Erin and also Jason. So thank both of you. Oh...and for people criticizing Firefly and Serenity for being anachronistic, Glen Whitman makes a good point in reference to the new movie:

"This is sci-fi the way I like it: gritty and realistic, not clean, white, and shiny. (Perhaps not coincidentally, Serenity's characters use "shiny" as slang for anything desirable.) George Lucas originally conceived Star Wars as a space western, but I don't think he ever succeeded in creating a true frontier feel, while Whedon does. For sci-fi fans weaned on Star Trek and its ilk, Whedon's vision of the future probably seems strangely anachronistic -- why, for instance, are people still using projectile weapons when there are laser guns to be had? But this is actually a more realistic model of technology adoption. We've had central A/C for decades now, but lots of people still cool their homes with window units. Cars from the 1960s are still on the roads. Durable capital has a way of sticking around, even when it seems obsolete, because the marginal improvement in quality doesn't justify the full cost of replacement. It's no surprise that hardscrabble space smugglers would be using less-than-current technology. "

Economist article

2005-09-22T09:47:00.000-05:00

I know I've posted a slate article already on this, but I feel the need to link to this economist article on the subject as well. The media keeps repeating the assertion that the number and strength of hurricanes is increasing due to global warming, despite the fact that the evidence just doesn't indicate whether there is any correlation or not.

Hate mail cometh.

2005-09-19T13:25:00.000-05:00

Newmark's Door linked to this which I couldn't help but steal and spread to me own far less widespread readership. Living in Detroit I am quite sick of the GM conspiracy theories and couldn't help but think of them when reading this passage:

"Halfway through my own reply, however, I suddenly became bored. Why do I spend so much time arguing against such obvious rubbish, which should be both self-refuting and auto-satirizing the moment someone utters it? Why not just go and read a good book?

The problem is that nonsense can and does go by default. It wins the argument by sheer persistence, by inexhaustible re-iteration, by staying at the meeting when everyone else has gone home, by monomania, by boring people into submission and indifference. And the reward of monomania? Power."

Yep...that about says it.

In other news, via geekpress there is an interesting story that makes me question whether or not DUI defendents should be able to avoid conviction by asking for trade secrets? (Story here) I'm currently on the side of the Florida judges, but I doubt very much the standard will stand. It's amazing how quickly the civil libertarians run on the issue of drunk driving.

Porn and Octoberfest

2005-09-18T16:59:00.000-05:00

The girl I'm seeing has no problem with my pornography collection...perhaps it's because she wants me to be healthy and live a long life. See this recent post over at MR.

Also, via Mahalanobis, this picture is a good reason why Octoberfest deserves to be celebrated.

Tomorrow is a big day for me...hopefully all will go well and maybe I'll post on why it was a big day tomorrow night.

Rock Novels

2005-09-16T14:21:00.000-05:00

Via King Dork himself, this guide to rock novels has put quite a few books onto my reading list as I make every attempt to get back into the fiction world. (Erin and I are trying to get a two person book club started so that we can discuss the same books for a change instead of constantly mentioning books the other one has never read.)

This one is just below King Dork when it comes out in April. Does anyone know if Dr. Frank ever intends to visit Detroit again?

The Anomalies, Joey Goebel (2003). Goebel was the lead singer for the punk band The Mullets, and his first novel follows a band of five Kentucky misfits who play "power pop new wave heavy metal punk rock music." Characters include a wheelchair-bound Satanist and an 80-year-old nymphomaniac, and if that doesn't make for a good band, then just shoot me now. The Baltimore City Paper called the book "enjoyable" and "often funny." Goebel's latest novel, Torture the Artist, earned the young author comparisons to Chuck Palahniuk.

I'll also point back to the Sexiest Female Guitarist list and state that I don't agree with hardly anything on this list, but there is one entry that is brilliant.

7. Ruyter Suys

Band: Nashville Pussy

I’ve never heard a Nashville Pussy song in my life and frankly, I really don’t ever want to either. But I will tell you one thing, Ruyter Suys is one of the hottest and filthiest female guitarists ever. She fulfills my woman jailbreak fantasy.

Weapon of Choice: The Gibson SG

Career Highpoint: The point of every live Nashville Pussy gig when lead singer Blaine Cartwright pulls Ruyter’s head back – while she’s on her knees mind you – and forces a bottle of beer down her throat as she proceeds to guzzle its entire barley-based contents.

Fun Fact: She claims that the reason why she plays guitar is because of Courtney Love – not because Love’s her idol, but for the opposite reason. "Courtney gives women a bad name in rock ‘n roll and uses her guitar as a necklace not as an instrument." She follows that statement up with this: "Being a woman in a band can be hard sometimes because people will never look at me for my musicianship, they'll always look at the boobs." Did I mention she only plays gigs in lace bras and leather pants and the leather pants usually come off mid-set? Contradictions are incredibly sexy.

I have very interesting friends

2005-09-16T11:20:00.000-05:00

Okay, so this recent post by one of my CA friends had me rolling. She is much wittier than me even though she is considerably younger. Hopefully she won't mind me pulling out the text as a means of getting people to check it out.

"I met a very nice man on CollarMe, today. He's a 'gentleman farmer', his name is Ben, and he lives close enough to me that if I stood on my roof and chucked a rock, it would probably land in his swimming-pool. Okay, just joking. He lives three miles away, in the multi-million dollar ranches up on the hillside. He buys and builds suburban housing tracts, and flies renovated WWII fighter planes as a hobby. He has a spoiled old cattle-dog named Josie that he loves the way I love Sunshine. He seems very nice, non-creepy, and fun. He offered to take me to Oakland tomorrow, as he was going there to negotiate a real-estate deal and I had mentioned I love the Bay area. Unfortunately, I can't go, because it would entail waking up at 4 a.m, and I can't imagine explaining that to my parents.

Did I mention he's 54?

Aerin: "You know, I've always believed age was just a number. It's irrelevant, really, because a difference in age doesn't stop two minds from clicking, or people from getting along excellently, and-

Aerin's Brain: "What about ninety-five?"

Me: "Wha...?"

Aerin's Brain: "What if he was ninety-four?"

Me: "Oh, yuck!That's- that's totally gross!"

My Brain: "So, age is just a number until you hit ninety-four, and then age is just age?"

Me, turning on my CD player: "I'm not continuing this conversation."

My Brain: "What about 80? Do you dig guys in their eighties? Fixed income isn't so great, but there's always inheritance-"

Me, singing with the music, over the voice in my head: "What follows, is the whitest lace of lii-iiight, what swallows whole, just begs to be imbruuuued..."

My Brain: "70 would be a nice age to settle down with a sweet-young-thing. I hear Viagra is getting cheaper by the day, and there's nothing abnormal about-"

Me, cutting off the voice: "WHAT FOLLLLLOOOOWS, HAS LEAD ME TO THIS PLACE, WHERE I BEEE-LONG, WITH ALL ERAAAA-AASED!"

Brain Voice: "But you're probably right, stick with guys close to retirement, and drop 'em before social security runs thin! Right-o!"

Me: "You'll stop now, or I won't take you to see Peter Murphy!"

Brain, sulkily: "And just how old is Mr. Murphy, eh?"

Me: "That's quite enough from you. Shut up, or I'll- I'll- I'll watch 'Seventh Heaven', and rot you where you stand! I'll do it!"

Brain:"...Yes'm."

Do you want to know the worst part...I can feel myself getting creepier as I get older. An 18 year old I hit on at 3 a.m. at National Coney Island called me up the other night drunk and I could feel how creepy I was as I contemplated whether or not if I was with her she would have wanted to make out. Yeah...I'm the creepy old guy now...damnit.

Slate Article Revisited

2005-09-13T19:48:00.000-05:00

Okay, so this post is really nothing new. It relates back to the Slate article I linked to below. I received an email (rather rapidly I might add) that encouraged me to provide additional content from the article in the post because a) many readers may not click on the link to read the article themselves and b) if the link were to stop working the entire post would essentially become worthless. I think these are valid points, so here are some of the excerts from the article that I keyed in and the reason I linked to the article in the first place.

"Scientists also agree that in recent years, hurricanes have become more frequent and severe, at least in the Atlantic Ocean. After 24 years of relative quiet, more than 30 major hurricanes have churned in the Atlantic since 1995. Most researchers, however, think that increase has nothing to do with global warming. Those who study tropical cyclones say that Katrina was part of a natural cycle of angry storms that will batter North America for decades. "

"There is one hurricane scientist who believes he has found a possible link between global warming and storm intensity. But it's an entirely theoretical one. In the Aug. 4 edition of Nature, Kerry Emanuel of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology presented math models that he said "show a substantial increase in potential intensity with anthropogenic global warming, leading to the prediction that actual storm intensity should increase with time." Emanuel concedes, however, that the observed storm intensities do not match what the models predict and that his study can only "suggest" that global warming "may" lead to more intense storms. "

"As John Tierney, among others, pointed out last week, property owners don't have much financial incentive to respect the risks of living in a hurricane zone. The federal government's flood insurance stakes property owners to much of the cost of rebuilding on the site that's been inundated. Studies show that thousands of coastal dwellers have received federal insurance payments for the same site following at least two different floods."

So there you go. I'd like to thank my emailer and would like to encourage her to post a comment sometime as it might encourage me to post a bit more too (she also commented on my recent lack of posting...hey who knew I had fans?).

Slate article

2005-09-13T13:51:00.000-05:00

I'm not going to comment on this article except to say Slate isn't exactly a right wing publication and it does mention one piece of information I hadn't yet heard. "The Flood Insurance Reform Act, signed into law by President George W. Bush in June 2004, could change some of this. The new law is designed to discourage property owners from rebuilding in repeatedly flooded areas and would help homeowners to either elevate their homes or to build on high and dry sites." This relates back to an earlier post of mine where I blamed subsidized flood insurance for deaths during Katrina. Of course, the funding for this act is nowhere to be seen and as the article mentions, it is unlikely to get anywhere with the call to rebuild in New Orleans.

Odds and Ends

2005-09-13T11:46:00.000-05:00

Too sexy to teach religion? Obviously the Church should think about adjusting it's marking strategy.

I haven't added it to the left margin yet, but The NFL Cheerleader Blog can be read for the articles, but why bother when there are so many pictures?

Some quotes:

It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place. H. L. Mencken

A ''Bay Area Bisexual'' told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires. Woody Allen

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying. Woody Allen

"My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself." Emo Philips.

"My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often." Emo Philips.

"There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn't stand for that." Steve Martin.

"Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife." Groucho Marx.

"I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife." Tony Curtis.

"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind." Humprey Bogart.

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." Joe E Lewis.

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Benjamin Franklin.

"I drink to make other people interesting." George Jean Nathan.

"Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money." Robin Williams.

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're going to feel all day." Dean Martin.

"The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a beer bottle, they're on TV." Homer Simpson.

Anyway...time to get some work done.

Talk to ya all soon.

Flat Tax Redux

2005-09-12T16:55:00.000-05:00

I've posted on the fact that flat tax reform is sweeping across Europe so I thought I'd just take a second to point out this economist article about a proposal for a flat tax in Britain. You can dig around for my earlier comments if you want, but the basic gist is that I don't understand why the U.S. left treats the idea as though it is particularly ridiculous.

Katrina...my two cents.

2005-09-12T14:58:00.000-05:00

I haven't posted much lately and I've been deliberately avoiding posting about Katrina because it is being addressed so widely and because I know I'm going to subject myself to attack if I comment, but nonetheless after listening to NPR for a sizeable portion of the weekend I decided that I would make a few points that I haven't heard mentioned much and point to a couple of articles as well.

The first point I want to make is that while I don't disagree that things were handled poorly on all levels, including the Federal level, I am still a little suprised by the level of disbelief and outrage. I took a geography class my freshman year of college where we discussed New Orleans. This was back during the Clinton administration. The professor stated as a matter of fact that it was only a matter of time before a storm came along and wiped away New Orleans. It's a city that exists below sea level. Expecting the city to go on forever without being destroyed is a kind of optimism that dumbfounds me and that is why I don't really understand this idea that there was more that we could or should have done to prevent the destruction in the first place. I understand the complaints about handling supplies and evacuation, but I don't understand the idea that any amount of resources devoted to stopping the effects of natural occurrences is justified regardless of the degree of impact it might have. I lived in California for many years and it's sad to say, but people who live in houses in the hills have to expect that at some point a mudslide is going to destroy their house, and if you live someplace below sea level you have to expect that at some point you are going to be flooded. Part of the real problem in my mind is that flood insurance is oversubsidized so that it is "affordable." Charging less for insurance doesn't change the cost in the long run. It increases the moral hazard problem and because people are not paying the true value of the insurance it increases the amount of people who chose to live in areas that are likely to be flooded.

I have also heard many people comment that Bush took funding from the levees for Iraq. The unstated premise is that money kept for use on the levees would have been used to increase their stability. Forget for a moment that it is not at all clear that stronger levees would have been able to withstand the effects of Katrina, it is also not at all clear that the money would have been used toward that end. As the Washington Post reported here, funding for the levees has moved towards questionable projects.

"Before Hurricane Katrina breached a levee on the New Orleans Industrial Canal, the Army Corps of Engineers had already launched a $748 million construction project at that very location. But the project had nothing to do with flood control. The Corps was building a huge new lock for the canal, an effort to accommodate steadily increasing barge traffic.
Except that barge traffic on the canal has been steadily decreasing."

Also from the article: "But overall, the Bush administration's funding requests for the key New Orleans flood-control projects for the past five years were slightly higher than the Clinton administration's for its past five years. Lt. Gen. Carl Strock, the chief of the Corps, has said that in any event, more money would not have prevented the drowning of the city, since its levees were designed to protect against a Category 3 storm, and the levees that failed were already completed projects. Strock has also said that the marsh-restoration project would not have done much to diminish Katrina's storm surge, which passed east of the coastal wetlands."

So there is that. There is also another point that some of my Libertarian friends have already keyed in on, but that I feel the need to reiterate. Those who think that the government should have been there to solve the problem must have missed the fact that much of the problem was the government. It was businesses and charities that acted quickly and efficiently and it was the government at all levels that thwarted their efforts at every turn. The Salvation Army and the Red Cross were just two of many charities planning rescue operations and attempts to deliver supplies. One of the great ironies, that I hope will not be forgotten by the left is that Wal-Mart, sometimes referred to as the great Satan, "is being held up as a model for logistical efficiency and nimble disaster planning, which have allowed it to quickly deliver staples such as water, fuel and toilet paper to thousands of evacuees." I can't help but comment that this is due to the same efficiency that is so often decried by its opponents as destructive to our nation. Article here.

To me the biggest scandal is the residents of the city who were prevented from leaving the city by law enforcement officials at all levels. This seems to be a recurring story. People could have walked to the West Bank after the storm but were not allowed to cross the bridge for no discernible reason. I understand that there were issues of lawlessness that prevented many from entering the city (the accounts of ambulances and other emergency service vehicles waited across the bridge but refusing to enter because of accounts of people shooting at emergency personnel), but I can't fathom a good reason why you wouldn't let people out. I've heard many people claim that it was the result of racism. That the authorities wanted black people to die. I think that is a rather absurd conclusion personally, though I know some of my readers will agree with it wholeheartedly. For now though, I'll await the inevitable investigation and see if I'm proven wrong. My suspicion however is that once again the government thought that by controlling everyone and everything it could do a better job organizing everything than people could do on their own and thus thought that they were actually doing some good by "maintaining order." It's times like this that I want to compile Hayek's dissertations on spontaneous order and send them to everyone in government. Anyway...That's my two cents.

Rabbits

2005-09-12T11:33:00.000-05:00

So I went to the Rocky Horror Stage Show, not the Rocky Horror Picture Show, this weekend. It was fun and Erin is now excited about the prospect of going to see RHPS down in Bowling Green, OH with me (they have a monthly showing). It was a good time. I only managed to really screw up once and it didn't cause too much of a problem so I suppose it went pretty well. Erin also engaged in acts of not so subtle manipulation toward her wicked ends of getting me to buy a rabbit for a pet. As we had dinner she commented that the pet store across the street that she ordered her pet food from hadn't called her yet about it. I was just trying to be helpful and suggested we go check on the order to confirm when it might be in since we were in the area. Then, somehow, we ended up by the rabbits and one of them collaborated with her to make me feel guilty about the tiny enclosure he was being kept in. He sneezed repeatedly and rubbed his rabbit nose and stood on his hind legs as he stared at me. As I tried to look at other rabbits Erin kept pointing out that he would not take his eyes off of me. Then she kept insisting that I wanted to hold a rabbit, just to see how it would feel. Finally I caved in and held the rabbit in my arms. He proceeded to lick my face. He or she (it didn't like it when we tried to check) was terribly affectionate and active and, at the risk of sounding like I have some semblance of a heart, adorable. When I put it back down it looked at me like it couldn't believe I would abandon it. It was a difficult walk away. Then on the ride home Erin kept saying things like, "well, if you were going to get it, what would you name it?" and "just think, about now the rabbit is going to sleep all alone in his small cage with no company and nowhere to play." The next day she bought me some books on rabbits. I keep pointing out that if I took a rabbit or a walk with me in the park I'd probably have lots of hot 19 year old girls fawning all over me because of how adorable it would be, but she remained undetterred. Anyway, it looks like I'm going to have to start reading up on rabbits, because sooner or later I will be getting one. That much is clear.

Oh, and if the rabbit is a girl I've decided to name it Trillian, from the Hitchhiker's "Trilogy."

Sorry for the Sporadic Posting

2005-08-30T16:34:00.000-05:00

Hey all,

I apologize for the sporadic posting, but don't expect it to pick up again for awhile. I went down to Austin and had an interesting time. As Jason is so fond of pointing out, I lead a very random life. I got lots of phone numbers, as seems to be the case whenever I'm in a location where I can't conceivably have a relationship with a woman. I had a female bartender at a rather notorious bar ask for my phone number, and despite my intoxicated state I have to say she was smoking hot...and she spoke Spanish. Sorry, personal turn on (probably because I don't understand Spanish). I got the phone number of the girl working the front desk, literally when I called down to get a wakeup call for the next day. I mean I was on fire. That being said, I indulged in this reckless abandon mainly because of a fight between my new lady friend and myself the first night I arrived in Austin. I made the mistake of answering my cell phone while rather intoxicated (when will I ever learn?). In any case, once I got back, she and I reconciled and have been having a good ole time ever since. I can't divulge any specifics of our relationship since she is a very private person (which makes the irony of her liking me all the more ironic) and if she were to see me putting all the details out there on the internet she would likely punch me...and not in the fun kinky kind of way (she took kickboxing and has a stun gun so I'm not being a "wussy" about this). Anyway, for the time being things are going well and I have put my drinking on hold. Drinking is what I do to meet women and since I've met one, really I can't justify it and would have to admit I'm an alcoholic if I continued. (okay, it is pretty hard to avoid going to see my goddess waitress at the bar, but she never really liked me anyway so I figure it will save me a pretty penny not tipping her 50% or more of my tab everytime I go out.) Anyway, not much new to report. I'm in my first real relationship ever and it is going well so far. Plus, we are going to get to see MeatLoaf live this next month. Can you imagine anything more romantic than seeing MeatLoaf with a girl? Apparently alot of women can, but luckily this one doesn't seem to be one of them.

Talk to you soon (hopefully),

Josh

Austin, TX coming up

2005-08-13T18:54:00.000-05:00

Well, despite the confusion of the relationship, I think I can say with some certainty I'm now seeing someone. It's a bit weird, but it is a really good feeling. Of course, I'm running off to Austin, TX for a week for work on Monday and a couple of people have suggested to me this is the perfect opportunity to have a one night stand before the relationship hits monogomous territory. It's somehow ironic, but people's confidence that I would be able to get a one night stand have spiked since I started seeing someone. I don't think it's because it proves I can get someone of the opposite sex to pay attention to me, but rather I think it's because they recognize women are generally more interested in someone who is supposedly off the market. Of course, the chances of me meeting a woman in Austin are pretty slim...I really don't like southern accents.

Anyway, hope to update more soon. Just wanted everyone to know I didn't die from drinking.

Night.

An interesting thought

2005-07-22T11:34:00.000-05:00

Maybe this is why I do better with foreign women than American women?

Bruce Campbell in Royal Oak

2005-07-19T16:18:00.000-05:00

Well I haven't posted recently, and sadly this won't be an extensive post, but I am excited. Friday should prove to be one of the more eventful days of my life so far. Bruce Campbell, yes THE BRUCE (Don't Call me Ash) CAMPBELL is going to be in Royal Oak, MI for a book signing and screening of his movie Man with the Screaming Brain and not only will I be there, not only will I meet Bruce Campbell in person, but I will be doing it with a girl who refuses to call it a date, but nonetheless tells me that I look like Bruce Campbell who she happens to adore. I am very excited in deed.

Incidentally, my favorite Bruce Campbell related quote that wasn't a line delivered by him you ask? From The Dead Hate the Living: (Characters stuck in a dead end as zombies approach. One of the characters is freaking out and the other tells him to calm down and says) "Just ask yourself, what would Bruce Campbell do?" I want that on a bumper sticker.

New Post

2005-07-05T16:26:00.000-05:00

I haven't posted since I went to D.C. which as one astute reader realized meant I did find a hotspot...I found several as a matter of fact. It was a pretty good trip actually. I did well in my training conference and at night I got to experience the nightlife of Georgetown. That being said, I way overspent while in D.C. I couldn't stop going out and when I go out I drink heavy and buy lots of people drinks which is a bad combination because the next day you find yourself calling to check on all your credit cards and make sure you still have some credit available. In any case, the first night I went out around 11 at night and the area was dead which made little sense considering its a college town so I asked about it and was told that D.C. is a happy hour kind of town and people start drinking around 6 and go home around 10 because they have to get up so early. Well, this lead to one of the poorer decisions of my drinking life which was to show up and start drinking at 6...the problem with this was that by the time 10 o'clock rolled around I had drank what I normally drink by closing time, but I still had 4 hours till closing time and found myself unable to leave. So as a result I don't really know what happened after 10 o'clock that night. I do know I met many many people because I have their business cards. I met some fairly influential people apparently, I just don't really remember it. In an odd asside, the following day I got a call from someone with a gender ambiguous name to my mind because I had never heard it before (though others think I'm insane for not realizing it was a guy's name) who told me they had met me the previous day and that they couldn't get my face out of their mind and how I was the hottest guy at the bar. I asked what "she" looked like and was told 5'10 and blonde to which I replied "you sound hot." Apparently this person lived in Michigan as do I so we arranged to go hang out when I got back to Michigan. When I called back to talk to this person some more I got the voicemail and the voice recording was so obviously a guy. Now I left a message and was perfectly willing to hang out with this person, though not particularly interested in it being a date, but he never called me back. I have no idea how to feel about that. On the one hand it felt really good to be told how hot I was, but it makes the rejection of not getting a call back seem strangely worse despite the fact that I wasn't looking for a date with a guy.

While in D.C. I also visited some friends in Virginia and had a great time and got quite a few numbers, though they are practically useless since I don't go to VA very often ... let's say once ever. Still, it boosted my ego to know that there are parts of the country where women actually find me attractive. I really have to consider moving there.

Now for the tell tale sign that I spend too much time at my local bar. While in D.C. I got a call from my local bar asking about me and making sure I was alright. A little disturbing to be sure, but rather sweet and funny. The bouncer who called me knew I was in D.C. but apparently the owner was drunk and had been asking about me. She would not get on the phone with me.

Fastforward to this past Friday. I'm back in Michigan and I go out with a girl I thought was my friend. We go to my bar and are going heavy. At the end of the night she is hooking up with two other girls and some guys. We end up going to a house party where we know absolutely noone and she is in the bathroom and then the bedroom making out with these girls and possibly some guys (it was not entirely clear). Now I'm pretty drunk but not so drunk that I don't remember what happened with some clarity. I was about ready to fall asleep and told the guys there that if anything happened to her I would hold them responsible and I threatened them telling them how I love this girl and would do anything to make sure she doesn't get hurt. The guy whose house it was told me I had to get out after that, which I was fine with but told him I wouldn't leave without talking to the girl I came with first. I mean to me this is obvious. I'm not going to leave a girl in a house full of strangers who are drunk. He won't let me go back and talk to her and ends up pushing me down the stairs, dragging me across the lawn, and kicking me. The girl ends up seeing what happens and ends up going back to that house with the girls and guys.

The next day I got into a fight with the girl. She keeps missing the point entirely. She tells me that the fight was my fault (does it even matter that I didn't throw a single punch?) and that she thinks I'm blaming her for the fight. As I keep trying to explain to her, I don't care if I did start the fight, if she really was my friend she would have left the party with me when I got kicked out. As I tried to explain, if she got into a fight with one of the girls and got kicked out, regardless if she was at fault, how would she feel if I left her and went back into the house to make out with the girl and her friends who just kicked her ass. She just didn't seem to get it. Then later she had the nerve to call me back and ask for the girl's phone number. Because I didn't want to be a jerk I gave it to her, but then I called back and left a message on her voicemail telling her how little respect she was showing me and asking her to delete my number from her cell and never call me again. The next day she calls me though...I have already deleted her number from my cell so I don't know who is calling when the number pops up and I pick it up. This started a brief exchange where she once again claimed I was blaming her for the fight and I told her that wasn't it but I didn't want to fight over it anymore and hung up on her. I really liked this girl and really wanted to be friends with her. I would have liked to have dated her, though she had no interest in me. I suppose its good I found out how little she cared about me though.

The day after the kicking incident I found out the guys who did it were cops, so woohoo for me. One of the bouncers told me they pulled that kind of stuff all the time and if he'd have known I was leaving with them he would have stopped me. Also, one of them was friends with the owner so I talked to a waitress who told me after how drunk I've been in the bar in the past and how nice a guy I am in that state she didn't think anyone there would find it believable that I would start a fight so I shouldn't worry. I thought that was pretty sweet I have to say and made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside...or maybe that was the shots...anyway Saturday became my day of depression and I drank from noon to 2 a.m. My favorite waitress, the most beautiful woman in the state of Michigan started regulating how much I could drink around 10 p.m, hence I didn't black out or anything. I really do adore her and proposed marriage several times over the course of the night.

Anyway, I have some other news to report, but I have some things I have to do so maybe later. Hope everyone had a good 4th of July weekend and I look forward to catching up on everyone else's blogs too.

Night

Bad Weekend....Bad.

2005-06-13T12:21:00.000-05:00

I did horribly this weekend. Not much else to say, except that the alcohol helped to make the rejection more tolerable. Originally I anticipated my blog being more about economics as that is one of my big interests and my field of study, but women have driven me to the bottle and so my posts have become pretty much about my sometimes sober, but increasingly drunken attempts to convince women that I am a worthwhile human being. With one notable exception, this has proven a huge failure, but I will not be deterred. In any case, it seems some of my friends have taken to checking on my blog to see if I survived another week/weekend, so even though I don't much feel like recounting my rejections right now I figured I would pop my head in and say hi and let them know I'm still alive. I'm not looking for tons of phone calls right now. Anyway, I might introduce some new stories about the weekend soon...then again I might just curl up and go into hibernation.

I will be in D.C. for a couple of weeks which could mean very heavy posting (nothing to do) or very little posting (I found a hotspot where hot law students decide they love me and want to hook up every night). Somewhere around the halfway mark I will let you know which turned out to be the case.

Back to work.

Monday was awesome

2005-06-08T22:41:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone. Okay, so I have a problem. I went out on Monday night and just by accident I ended up in my favorite bar. Really it was an accident. See, I don't follow sports, but apparently Monday was a pistons game so the bars were packed and when I went out for coffee I saw they were packed with attractive women so I figured I'd drop in and try my best. The first two blondes I keyed in on were nice and receptive at first, but at some point they moved on to other guys. I was sad...then I started playing with two brothers, one of them a personal trainer and you would think that would not be a wise move since I don't look anything like a physical trainer. Well two girls came up and started playing pool with us. I ended up spending most of the time sitting at a table talking to the blonde one. I'm not one to kiss and tell, but at the end of the night my lips had not gone unkissed. I also got her phone number and her friends. Here is where Mr. Drunken Stupidity comes in. I have no idea where I put her card and the number of her friend. I feel like a total jerk right now because I can't call her and swore that I would. On the off chance that you are reading this, I hope you will give me a call as I'm pretty sure I gave you my number too or you can email me through the blog. I don't want to get too much more specific than that because while I would like to brag, I don't want to sully anyone's reputation by letting the public at large know they would associate with me...although she did say that I was the cutest guy in the bar. This is in sharp contrast to how my night started with a dogbite when I approached two women walking a doberman down the street and because I had the audacity to approach them and attempt to talk to them the dog was "suck?" on me. For those of you who wish to condemn the idea that a guy should approach two women on a public street at night because they "might be scared" I want to point out that due to the Pistons game there were cops EVERYWHERE and one in fact saw the dog attack me and came over to MY defense. This is what I hate generally about attractive women...they think that I don't have a right to approach them and should realize I'm not attractive enough to talk to them. Well to that I say, get over yourself. Increasingly, thanks to my drunkeness at the bar, I am beginning to actually believe I'm a really cool person. As it turns out, I did not cause any problems during my last blackout and all the waitresses and bouncers seem to like me quite a bit. I am cooler than I ever imagined. On a side note, as a result however of my drunkeness on a Monday night and the fact that I accidentally woke up my roommate on my way in, I am going to have to find a new place to live. I'm hoping to stay in the area so I can continue walking to the bar and home and not have to waste tons of money on cab fare or find another bar. I think my roommate is overreacting hugely, but it's her name on the paperwork so ultimately it's her call...I won't mention the times she has brought people home drunk and woken me up...nope, not gunna mention that at all. I'm a little bitter, but I'll get over it. Anyway, Monday was awesome and if the tall blonde angel who thought I was so cute or her friend who thought I was so cool do read this, I hope they will contact me so it doesn't have to be a onetime thing. Night.

Incidentally...I'm currently sitting in the dark due to a power outage...luckily my laptop batter was fully charged. It has been hours...how long does it take to fix a power outage? Ugh...Night.

Blackout Part II

2005-06-06T11:41:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I had another blackout this weekend. This time I fully intend to blame my roommate for starting her housewarming party at 5 in the afternoon giving me far too many hours to drink. None of her friends liked me and none of them would talk to me so I kept getting drunker and drunker until around midnight I began my walk down to the bar. I do not know if I made it to the bar that I intended to go to or not. Whereever I ended up, I did end up getting a call from a friend at 1:15 in the morning... a call I do not remember but that she claims was very memorable. Apparently I was hitting on my friend on the phone and some girl wherever I was thought that I was hitting on her and starting cussing me out. That was pretty much the story of my weekend. Women being appalled that I would have the nerve to try and talk to them, even when I wasn't. Anyway, hopefully I'm still welcome at the bar. Dani has me nervous that I'll get kicked out, but as I said before, by most accounts I'm a really fun drunk. The sad thing is that I almost prefer the blackouts now. Rejection doesn't hurt quite as much when you can't remember being rejected. Anyway, that was my weekend. Oh yeah, and I approached the coffee shop girl this morning and got a quasi rejection/cop out from her. When I asked her out she said she would have to "think about it." This is one of many girl codes for "no." Nonetheless, I told her next time I'm in I'll ask her about it again. Fingers crossed-I need a girlfriend so I can stop drinking or if she wants me to continue drinking at least so I know what happened to me the next day.

Quote for the Day

2005-06-02T00:14:00.000-05:00

I don't know if I've thrown this one out before, but here goes.

"If you cannot make God love you, make him fight you. If he will not give you the embrace of the lover, compel him to give you the embrace of the wrestler." --Sri Aurobindu

Story of my life.

For those of you not happy with a solitary quote, here are a few random ones.

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them. ~H.L. Mencken

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. ~Charles Schulz

After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi. ~P.J. O'Rourke

When somebody tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football. ~Author Unknown

"Sex without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best." — Woody Allen.

"I remember my first sexual encounter because I kept the recipe." — Jeff Dahmer. (I hope that one isn't real)

"If it weren't for pickpockets I'd have no sex life at all." — Rodney Dangerfield.

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation... The other eight are unimportant." — Henry Miller.

"If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised." — Dorothy Parker (1893—1967), US writer.

"It would be less demanding, enslaving, perplexing and strenuous for a healthy male to screw a thousand women in his lifetime than to try to please one, and the potential for failure would be less." — Irma Kurtz.

"If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." — Aristotle Onassis

"I don't understand how women can spend so much money, I mean, understand, she don't pay for her own drinks, and she's got her own pussy!" (unknown)

"Of course I like women. Historically, man has always been attracted to Evil." — Timothy McClanahan.

"The Two Things about Women:1. When complaining, they don’t want your advice, they want your sympathy.2. Don’t you dare tell them you can sum them up with just Two Things." — Glen Whitman.

"If there is one thing I know about women, it's that you should never laugh until you absolutely — I repeat, absolutely — know that they're joking." — Mark Dockham.

Okay...more than I originally intended, but my own thoughts aren't nearly as coherent as other peoples' thoughts.

Night

Hello, my name is Josh and I'm an Alcoholic, but a really fun one.

2005-06-01T15:51:00.000-05:00

Okay, so despite my last post, I went out drinking for the holiday weekend. I discovered that yes, I did throw up in the pizza joint and much to my suprise, they were really okay with that. They told me on Saturday that I'm the coolest and nicest drunk and that I'm free to throw up there anytime. So that's good news. Also I was not there with any hot girls, however yes, bouncers did drive me home. The pizza girls did not seem to have an explanation why, but the bouncers were apparently really nice to me and cleaned me up and everything. Little tip, if you aren't a drunk asshole, bouncers are really cool guys.

I was out drinking on Saturday and the boyfriend of a girl I hang out with sometimes threatened me...it was pretty hilarious. I was so drunk he could have pummeled me for an hour and I wouldn't have felt a thing. Sure I might not be able to walk in the morning, but for the time being I wouldn't feel a thing. I just told him he could take me out back and beat me, but then I tried to hug him and offered to buy him a drink. I played cutthroat with a few guys I met there. I was also vaguely depressed because on Friday a girl had come up to me and told me I looked nice and sweet and ran her fingers through my hair telling me I had the best hair ever. Then she said she left her drink at the bar and she'd be right back never to return. I saw her on my way back from the bathroom and she totally dissed me but also this guy was being a jerk trying to grab her and she told me she didn't know the guy. At the end of the night he was the one she left with though. Women are impossible.

Anyway, I've decided to continue drinking and Saturday is going to be particularly bad. We are having a house warming party and my roommate has forbidden me from hitting on her friends. It starts at 5...I figure I'll be too drunk to comply by 7 and then I'll have to hit the bar until 2, so I may lose all motor skills by Sunday...Go Team.

Okay...enough of this boring updating stuff. Talk to you soon,

Josh

I am not going to drink for awhile

2005-05-23T12:08:00.000-05:00

Okay,

Saturday night was apparently very eventful, but due to my first ever black out I don't remember most of it. I remember getting to the bar and a girl coming over and doing a few drinks with me. I remember going back to sit with her friends who seemed to like me. Then nothing for a long time. I vaguely recall approaching the owner on the street, though I have no idea what I said. I then recall throwing up all over myself in some location that I'm not entirely sure of where it was. I think it might have been the pizza place. If anyone from the pizza place reads this and can confirm that I was not there with any hot women I would appreciate it. I also apologize for any inconvenience. I then remember being driven home by two very big guys...I think they might have been bouncers. This confuses me though. I checked my outgoing calls on my cell phone when I woke up. I had made a call for a cab at 2:47 in the morning. I'm pretty sure a cab didn't take me home, but I would have been out still if I called which means I couldn't have been at the bar since it closes at 2 a.m. If I wasn't at the bar why would bouncers take me home? I have a theory that doesn't make me feel particularly good. The theory is that I went to the pizza place with the owner of the bar, threw up, and she had the bouncers drive me home. Please don't let that be the case. Also, I am just hoping at this point that I didn't do anything bad in the bar in front of my favorite waitress who is as cute and sexy as any woman alive. One can hope. I will be going back to the bar to try and ask her what happened and apologize if I was bad, but I'm going to try taking it a little easier in the future. There is nothing scarier than waking up and having no idea what happened. Also finding dried vomit all over your shirt and pants is not a plus either.

In case anyone is wondering though, while the black out is probably alcohol related, I don't think the vomit was. I tried to eat on Sunday and threw up again. I'm eating today, but just chili that is so runny its almost water. Anyway...I thought I would give you all a heads up. On the off chance that anyone who reads this knows what I did on Saturday and who I did it in front of, I'd appreciate a heads up.

Thanks,

Bye

Team America: World Police

2005-05-21T20:45:00.000-05:00

Team America is out on DVD now. I cannot recommend this movie more...I saw it three times in the theaters. Here is one of my favorite musical numbers:

song: ["End of an Act"] I miss you more than Michael Bay missed the mark, When he made Pearl Harbor. / I miss you more than that movie missed the point, And that's an awful lot, girl. / And now, now you've gone away, And all I'm trying to say, is: Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you. / I need you like Ben Affleck needs acting school, He was terrible in that film. / I need you like Cuba Gooding needed a bigger part, He's way better than Ben Affleck. / And now, all I can think about is your smile, and that shitty movie, too! Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you. / Why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies? / I guess Pearl Harbor sucked, just a little bit more than I miss you.

Courtesy of IMDB a few more quotes:

Gary Johnston: I was just a boy when the infidels came in their Blackhawk helicopters. The infidels fired at the oil fields and they lit up like the eyes of Allah. Burning oil rained down from the sky and cooked everything it touched. I could only hide myself and cry as my goats were consumed by the fiery black liquid death. In the midst of the chaos, I could swear that I heard my goats screaming for help. As quickly as they had come, the infidels were gone. It was on that day I put a jihad on them. And if you don't believe it, you'd better kill me now cause I'll put a jihad on you.

Sean Penn: Last year I went to Iraq. Before Team America showed up, it was a happy place. They had flowering meadows and rainbow skies, and rivers made of chocolate, where the children danced and laughed and played with gumdrop smiles.

Lisa: Promise me you'll never die. Gary Johnston: You know I can't promise that. Lisa: Promise me you'll never die and I'll make love to you right now. Gary Johnston: I promise I'll never die.

Tim Robbins: Let me tell you how all this works: you see, Team America is funded by the corporations, so they fight for the corporations... while they sit in their corporation buildings... and they're all corporation-y... and they make lots of money!

Gary Johnston: We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

The movie is hilarious and I think it has a good wholesome message despite the profanity, sex, and violence.

Playing Pool

2005-05-16T13:44:00.000-05:00

I played pool a little drunk last night and it ended up being the best part of my week...I ended up getting a date with a successful woman...she told me she would call me when we are both sober and set it up. I'm feeling pretty good about it.

That being said, I screwed up by not getting her phone number, but I will see her again many times I'm sure and people who know her told me she really likes me so I think I'm safe.

In any case...I was talking to Matt who has not seen Confessions of a Dangerous Mind...Matt, Chuck Barris was the name I was thinking of. Here are some quotes to make you want to see the movie.

last lines
Chuck Barris: I came up with a new game-show idea recently. It's called The Old Game. You got three old guys with loaded guns onstage. They look back at their lives, see who they were, what they accomplished, how close they came to realizing their dreams. The winner is the one who doesn't blow his brains out. He gets a refrigerator.

Patricia: Insane asylums are filled with people who think they're Jesus or Satan. Very few have delusions of being a guy down the block who works for an insurance company.

Jim Byrd: You're 32 years old, and you've achieved nothing. Jesus Christ was dead and alive again by 33. You better get crackin'.

[first lines] Dick Clark: I wouldn't want to live his life because he hasn't been happy all of his life. All I think is if you can find work, stay healthy, find somebody to share it with, you're the ultimate success. He's had some of the pieces of the puzzle, but not all of them.

Don't ask me why, but this also lead me to pull up some Donnie Darko quotes.

On the origins of Smurfette

Donnie: First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village, but the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario, it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That's what's so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What's the point of living if you don't have a dick?

Donnie: I made a new friend today. Dr. Lilian Thurman: Real or imaginary? Donnie: Imaginary.
(this interaction fits me perfectly)
Gretchen: You're weird. Donnie: Sorry. Gretchen: No, that was a compliment.
(so does that one)

Donnie: Why do you wear that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?

Gretchen: Donnie Darko? What the hell kind of name is that? It's like some sort of superhero or something
Donnie: What makes you think I'm not?

Gretchen: My mom had to get a restraining order against my step dad. He has emotional problems.
Donnie: Oh, I have those too. What kind does your step dad have?

Gretchen: Some people are just born with tragedy in their blood.

Okay...it for the day...rock on Michigan, and I'll let you all know when I have what I hope is my first successful date...

Just to let you all know i'm still alive.

2005-05-15T20:18:00.000-05:00

Okay so here is the thing. I am cute, smart, funny, and a pretty sweet guy. Despite what women claim, this is not what they really want. I was out this weekend with three girls who ended up all of them hooking up with guys who were not nearly as cute (though taller), borderline retarded, had senses of humor that made me want to pound a nail into the wall with my forehead, and were obviously just looking to get laid.

It all goes back to an assertion of mine that fails to make an impression on the women I talk to. Most of the women I know "claim" they do not like players. They claim they do not want to date players. Yet they invariably do date players. In fact, players can only be players if women do respond well to that behavior, therefore it goes without saying that women as a general rule do like players regardless of what they "claim."

Anyway...the love from my last post isn't even remotely interested in talking to me now that she is sober, the tall blonde waitress who I was working a longterm strategy to get a date is now engaged. Another very attractive waitress that is almost as beautiful as a human person can be is not only unimpressed by my ability to do 15 shots in a row without losing conciousness, but she is also in a relationship (or claims to be). In other news though, the three girls I was out with confirmed for me that women do seem to respond better to me when I'm heavily intoxicated. In fact, I went to National Coney Islands with them and got the phone number for an 18 year old girl who is in a relationship. Okay, so I haven't had the courage yet to find out if the number is real or not, plus I'm slightly disturbed because I can't remember her name (though I do remember the name of the girl she was with)...but in two more days I will call and let you all know.

Anyway, I just wanted to say hi. I'm gunna go play a few games of pool tonight and see if my blonde goddess is working so i can find out what to get her for a wedding present in the hopes that when she is ready for her second husband she thinks of me. Anyway,

Night

My life is over

2005-05-01T22:50:00.000-05:00

I'm in love...It looks like she isn't going to give me the time of day. Not sure what to do but don't expect many posts for awhile as I try to deal with my depression and try to find a way to convince this goddess to give me a chance and go out with me.

(She is the girl from my previous post incidentally).

Chat with ya all later.

A couple of days off

2005-04-29T09:16:00.000-05:00

Technically today is my day off for annual vacation. I'm in the office anyway, though not working particularly hard. This is going to prove to be a pretty interesting weekend though.

Yesterday I got told I looked "fly" by a guy who works at a Thai restaurant I go to. Then I hit on a girl in front of Matt who turned out to be 16, though he did admit that my technique was good, just a bit off with the aim. She was I must say very hot though so I think my optimism that she was of legal age was understandable.

Then I talked to my match.com girl who I had gone on a couple of dates with and she said she just wants to be friends, so I decided to go out drinking that night. Technically she told me this before the coffee shop, but anyway, I'm doing a kind of stream of conciousness thing here so just get used to it. I wasn't particularly upset that she "just wanted to be friends." To be perfectly honest I wasn't feeling anything either. What does bother me is how anti-sex she was with me (and anti kissing, making out, etc.) only to discover once she indicated we should be friends that in approximately the same amount of time we have been going out another guy has basically gotten to do everything with her short of actual intercourse. That kinda hurt.

So anyway, I go to a bar and there is an amazingly hot woman there. Insanely hot. Seriously, you could tell me this girl has every STD in the books and I would still have a hard time saying no to having sex with her, even unprotected sex. In any case, she was totally digging me, but I thought she was there with this guy...turns out I was wrong, but by the time I figured it out another guy had basically picked her up. She went home with him, and I wanted to weep. I did find out her favorite shot and where she works though so it looks like I'll be going to a new bar this weekend in the hopes of running into her.

I also met a very nice woman who was going to hook me up, but due to the lack of women in the bar that night and the fact that the one I really wanted was already taken, this was a lost cause. She did give me a raincheck though along with her number. It seems possible that we might go clubbing on Saturday and she can try to help me make some progress with a few of the women there.

Did I mention how hot the girl was I screwed up things with by not just randomly going up to her? this is the reason I normally make a move immediately. Hot girls have a limited amount of time before they are "off the market" as it were. Did I mention that as piggish as this may sound, she frenched a girl in the bar while I was there too and oh my god that was hot and had to have decreased the amount of time before some guy wore her down by like 150%.

Okay...gunna try and do some work now.

Talk to you all soon.

P.S. my home computer is exceptionally broken suddenly. Seriously, I can't do ANYTHING on it, so to my few friends who read this and like to send me emails calling me names or telling me how stupid I am, you will have to call me or send me an email at my work account until I get it fixed.

Night.

Masturbating may protect against prostate cancer

2005-04-20T09:43:00.000-05:00

In this New Scientist article it states "The protective effect is greatest while men are in their twenties: those who had ejaculated more than five times per week in their twenties, for instance, were one-third less likely to develop aggressive prostate cancer later in life." Some of my friends will realize immediately why this is of interest to me. Five times a week seems like an incredibly low and easy figure to reach. That's not even once a day, and a man in his twenties, such as myself, should easily be able to hit 3 times a day (granted one of those times may need to be a quickie). In an earlier post I admitted that some of the people I know found out how often I do it and thought I may "have a problem." As it turns out, I'm merely engaging in preventative medicine.

thanks to Jacqueline for the link.

A couple of Papers

2005-04-19T19:29:00.000-05:00

Just a couple of papers...

Monogamy's Law: Compulsory Monogomy and Polyamorous Existence

The Deliquency of Subprime Mortgages

The former article is of particular interest for my Polyamorous friends, the latter is of interest to me because of my limited days in the banking industry.

Late night Rambling

2005-04-15T23:46:00.000-05:00

Ugh...redhead messing with my mind.

She calls me up on Wed. and tells me she wants to be friends but felt uncomfortable the "other night." I resisted the urge to comment on the fact that she hadn't returned by calls for 4 days. I was less able to resist telling her that I wasn't even remotely uncomfortable until she started making out with a guy (not her boyfriend, but more importantly, not me) in front of me. She kept commenting back to how I had told her I was attracted to her. I told her that wouldn't be a problem if she would introduce me to one of her hot friends I could go out with. She told me all of her friends were hot, but none were single. She then relegated me to the "friend" role in the sort of way that makes it clear you aren't the person's friend, but rather someone they are going to use in a haphazard sort of way that will make you wish you were dead. She started to tell me her problems when a friend, presumably a real one, called and she told me she had to take it and would call me back later.

I went home and drank for a few hours...increasingly feeling the bitterness of the realization that I would never be a real friend for her. The realization that she was using me so that she could feel better about herself taunted me. I knew in my heart that even if one of her hot friends became single she would never try to fix me up with them for fear of losing me as a lapdog to make her feel attractive and wanted. Yeah, I guess you could say it was one of those mooments of lucidity that you live to regret, because I called her up since she never called me back as she promised. I got her voicemail and left her a message that went a little something like this.

Hi...I would like to be your friend, but I don't really think you want to be my friend. I think you are just using me and I've given up on letting women use me for anything other than sex. If you really are interested in being my friend give me a call back, but I'm not about to be the guy you only call when you are drunk or looking for someone to forgive you for your sins and tell you that whatever you did was okay.

That was paraphrasing, but it was equally bad and probably slightly slurred since I had done quite a few shots. The next morning I called and left a voicemail asking her to forget the previous night's message and give me a call sometime...to date she hasn't, and probably never will. I probably shouldn't be bummed about that, but I feel bad nonetheless, even though I think my assessment was accurate of her.

On another front, I met a woman online who I was worried would turn out to be a middle aged balding man, but I spoke to her on the phone today and she actually sounds young and attractive and most importantly from my perspective, female. We are going to have a picnic on Sunday and meet in person for the first time. Her continued response to me thus far has been "you are so weird." Hopefully this turns out to be a good thing.

Meanwhile, my roommate is giving me a hard time about my drinking and may not renew my lease, which is particularly annoying considering she fully admits that I haven't done anything wrong. She is just worried that I am drinking too much. I find this ironic because it implies that if I move out she will stop worrying about my drinking which really means she would never talk to me again if I moved out and if that is the case, than I can't see her caring about me at all and if she doesn't care about me at all I come back to the fact that I don't see why she should be concerned about drinking that she admits is not having any other negative effects on her other than this concern.

Anyway, I'll leave you with a few links.

From the Guardian: "In more than half of Nike's factories, the report said, employees worked more than 60 hours a day. In up to 25%, workers refusing to do overtime were punished." Read that again really quickly. 60 hours a day? Thanks to Mahalanobis for the heads up.

In honor of tax day...a link to a tax survey of some interest from the taxfoundation and the Idea Shop.

This piece on the prospect of an American flat tax from the Economist is interesting. For those who think the flat tax is somehow uniquely American, consider: "The experiment started in a small way in 1994, when Estonia became the first country in Europe to introduce a “flat tax” on personal and corporate income. Income is taxed at a single uniform rate of 26%: no schedule of rates, no deductions. The economy has flourished. Others followed: first, Latvia and Lithuania, Estonia's Baltic neighbours; later Russia (with a rate of 13% on personal income), then Slovakia (19% on personal and corporate income). One of Poland's centre-right opposition parties is campaigning for a similar code (with a rate of 15%). So far eight countries have followed Estonia's example (see article). An old idea that for decades elicited the response, “Fine in theory, just not practical in the real world,” seems to be working as well in practice as it does on the blackboard."

I'm disturbed by the decision by the WTO to accept the "public morals" defense in trade cases. See this article. I'm just generally against public morals though.

On that note...I'm done for tonight. I'll try to put up some interesting and fun quotes at a later date for ya....Night all

Arghness revisited

2005-04-09T10:22:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone. So last night was weird. I was working in the office at about 10 p.m. when the cute redhead down the hall who didn't return my calls for like two months calls me up and asks where her flowers are for her birthday. I told her that I was going to get them for her, but people told me it would be creepy since the last time I actually talked to her I told her I was attracted to her. She said no, she would have thought it was sweet and she doesn't believe I remembered, though my friends will confirm I tormented myself over this. Of course, I wasn't able to get any of them on the phone to confirm it when I needed to, but that is neither here nor there. So anyway, she was a bit drunk and they were going to a bar across from where I work so since she also didn't believe I was in the office she told me to meet her down there, which I did. Then she said she still wanted her flowers, but by now it was 11 at night. Not much chance of me finding a store so I go back to my office and confiscate a coworkers potted plant...I think it was a fern...and proceed to walk back into this bar with this huge almost dead plant. She appreciated it I think. She told me her boyfriend was on a cruise and she really wanted to get laid but couldn't. I offered my services...I also offered to kiss her, but she said no on both counts. That isn't even where I got hurt though. Where I got hurt was that less than an hour later she was making out with another guy who she had never met before. Don't get me wrong...he was tall and good looking and probably a really good guy so there was no reason that she shouldn't have been making out with him (well except for the bf thing) but I wasn't concerned about the boyfriend, I was concerned about the fact that here I was taking her a potted plant and I get nothing and this random guy gets to kiss her. So I'm a little pissed. I went back to the office and slept for a couple of hours and then went home, showered, shaved, and came back to the office because she is in today and I brought her a bottle of Hypnotic and a stuffed animal (a really cute bat...hey it was the only one that had the sticky stuff so it could look like it was holding the alcohol). When I knocked on the door her boss answered and said they were in a meeting so I left the stuffed animal and alcohol with him. Not that it will do me any good. One of her friends told me I never should have asked about the kissing her and that I just should have done it. Some days I hate myself. Okay...every day.

An interesting article

2005-04-01T20:45:00.000-05:00

Hi all,

I'm still in the office. I know what you are saying..."josh, why aren't you getting ready to go woo all those cute little blonde girls who adore you so much?" Well, I'll tell you. My partying has been pretty expensive lately so I've decided to be a little more reserved this weekend. Also they are moving the pay date for our checks from Fridays to Mondays which is totally screwing with me.

Anyway, my productivity as it is measured, not as it actually exists, is being pulled down. The way we measure productivity (one way at least) is in "hours per schedule." However that isn't exactly it. It's hours per productive schedule. And what constitutes productive? One that you are able to get all of the information that the national office wanted for it. Here is the problem. You sometimes get schedules where it is literally impossible to get all that the national office wanted for it because it involves an establishment that no longer exists or doesn't exist as the national office thought it existed. I'm getting tons of situations like that recently. I'm not complaining, I'm just worried about it. I pride myself on being a good worker. I'm not particularly bright or talented, but I make up with it through persistence and hard work. So the thought that my "productivity" is being hurt by these occurences is worrying me. Don't get me wrong though, I really like my job and I'm glad I'm here. So anyway, I just thought I would explain this so that my very few readers might understand me when I talk about my productivity and such.

Finally, the title of this post claimed there would be an interesting article. Here it is. I can guarantee you that virtually everyone who isn't an economist (and maybe even some that are) are going to find this slate article of Landsburgs either foolish or offensive, but I guess my economic training (or as some of my more anti-market comrades refer to it "indoctrination") makes me think he has some good points...but I'm not convinced. He is writing about the Schiavo case in the article titled "Imagine Terri were a Toaster." His basic assertion is that whatever Terri wanted to have happen to her remains while she was alive is basically irrelevant since she is effectively dead. There is a substantive problem with that.

1. She isn't dead (or rather she wasn't at the time this was a relevant issue).

It seems like a pretty important distinction. Still, I think the article is interesting and worth a read. I'll comment more later after I have a chance to think about it.

Movie plug and my listening habits

2005-03-31T22:37:00.000-05:00

I'm in the office still...it's late, but I can't get away. I keep thinking of things and I keep getting distracted because I love my XM radio...right now I am listening to Classic Supreme Court Arguments. I'm listening to the 1993(I think) Supreme Court case regarding the chokehold injunction. It is always fascinating to listen to the oral arguments before the Supreme Court. In any case, many people find out I listen to C-Span and they look at me suspiciously...rightly so.

Anyway, I was on the phone with Marie earlier. She had just seen the movie Cursed and commented it was a "stupid werewolf movie." This got me to thinking about one of my favorite werewolf series of movies, the Ginger Snaps series (3 movies total). Here are some quotes courtesy of IMDB to get you all out to rent this brilliant series.

Ginger: The fuck, Bee. This is your idea. If you don't like your ideas, stop having them.

[while burying girl under the shed]
Ginger: Think she's pretty?
Brigitte: If I wasn't here would you eat her?

Ginger: You swore we'd go together, one way or another.
Brigitte: When we were eight.

Ginger: I get this ache... And I, I thought it was for sex, but it's to tear everything to fucking pieces.

Ginger: [Playing with a kitchen knife] Wrists are for girls. I'm slitting my throat.

Ginger: I said I'd die for you!
Brigitte: No. You said you'd die with me. Cause you had nothing better to do.

Brigitte: [suicide note] No comment.

Written on psychologist's notepad after Brigitte explains her lycanthropic transformation: Lesbian?

There ya go. Not really anything new...but you guys should check out Ginger Snaps and Ginger Snaps: Unleashed

I looked at Slate for the first time in awhile today

2005-03-25T20:18:00.000-05:00

Hi everyone. It's just past 8 on a Friday, I'm still in the office and I'm a little tired and getting ready to go, so what do I do? I start pulling up websites I haven't read in awhile. I could be doing that at home, but for some reason I just like my office when I'm all by myself. I have my XM radio on and other than things getting a little warm, I'm comfortable.

Okay, so anyway, here is something I ran across. I haven't read slate in awhile, but here is a piece Landsburg wrote on Social Security that is pretty interesting.

"Now (and I am indebted to my colleague Alan Stockman for driving this point forcefully home), there is probably very little we can do right now in terms of deciding who gets what in the year 2020. That's because any decisions we make are subject to reversal through the political process. In 2020, old people either will or will not have the political clout to claim a bigger share of the pie. If they have that clout, they'll use it, and if not, not. And they won't be bound by anything we decided to do back in 2005."

First good point. Regardless of what we decide today, the old geezers are probably going to screw us when we get there. Don't take this the wrong way, but the only way to insure that they don't screw us is to start executing people when they turn a certain age...let's say 65. Then social security isn't a problem at all. In any case, that isn't Landsburg's point, but I think it is an important one that isn't considered too much. There is good reason not to consider it though. We can't not act because we expect to get screwed in the future...we have to try and find a way to make it so the old geezers don't feel the need to screw us. Hence Landsburg comes down on the side of the private accounts. Read the article here for his explanation.

'Kay...I'm done today

Fischer again

2005-03-24T21:44:00.000-05:00

Hi again. One more story. Fischer is now in Iceland. Can I just say, screw Iceland. Story here.

"The United States is an illegitimate country...just like the bandit state of Israel - the Jews have no right to be there, it belongs to the Palestinians," said Fischer, whose mother was Jewish.
"That country, the United States, belongs to the red man, the American Indian...It's actually a shame to be a so-called American because everybody living there is...an invader."

Okay...there is so much here I don't know where to start. One thing I'd like to ask, who the hell refers to American Indians or Native Americans as "the red man" anymore?

Also, the Israeli's did not invade the land they occupy. It belonged to England and was given to them. You might argue that England "took" it from someone, but that doesn't make the Jews living in Israel bandits or invaders.

Everyone living here is an invader huh? That's a bit like saying everyone living here is a slaveowner. Just because a subgroup of people at time A engage in an action does not translate into their offspring being responsible for all of their actions.

I really don't know why I'm dignifying his rants with any response at all, but I think it is important to note that talent in one area, even general intelligence, or IQ do not correlate with reasonableness or common sense.

Anyway, home for the night...catch ya all later.

Random stuff...trying to post some more

2005-03-24T20:00:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'm sorry, but this AP story is just funny. "ALBION, N.Y. -- When Diane Viza got into an argument with her son over whether she was sober, she drove to the local police station asked to take a sobriety test. That turned out to be a bad idea. " Yes, you can see where this is going. She failed the test and got a DUI. No, drunk driving isn't funny, but this is.

This story proves you shouldn't threaten to audit someone if you aren't actually an auditor. "He pulled out an official-looking but phony IRS business card that he had made after downloading the agency's logo from the Internet. It identified him as a senior auditor. Then he asked pointedly if the officers had been audited lately, and insinuated that he would audit them if they cited him. " Also, I know a thing or two about government work, and even if you have the ability to audit someone, most people wouldn't risk losing the decent pay and pleasant working conditions that they would lose if found out simply to avoid a $600 fine.

I think this story is ironic in light of this quote: "When there are lines to be drawn, we must and will be the ones to do it," he said. "Not outside actors. Not politicians, not pressure groups, not the media. Ours is and must remain a system of self-government."

Why do I find that funny? Let's say this quote wasn't talking about universities and was referring to the United States of America not allowing foreign governments, the U.N., and the media to dictate how they behave. Wait, that was/is the position of many in the Bush administration and elsewhere and it is exactly that position that gets so much derision by people like the professors at Columbia who are being accused of intimidating Jewish students who disagree with the Pro-Palestinian professors. Just a random thought.

Finally, for those who read Krugman's piece on the $600 million dollar figure with regards to Social Security and Lieberman, I feel duty bound to point out Lieberman apparently wrote a letter to the editor taking Krugman to task on his allegations. Here is the link. If you scroll down a bit further you can read Krugman's article that he is responding to. I might also add, that Krugman is clearly wrong on this count, though Lieberman, and the Bush administration are probably overstating the estimate as well. The 600 billion figure is a nominal figure, it is not necessarily an increase in real terms. Andrew over at Voxbaby gives a more thorough explanation of the distinction and the numbers here.

Did I say finally? Okay, one last one. Over at Cafe Hayek there is this post on the Georgetown University hunger strike and the question, why is the employer the person who is expected to be charitable and pay above market wages rather than the church or the students or just about anyone else to just give them the money outright? As always, he's more literate than me so read his post not mine.

Okay...that's it for now.

Hi again...i'm not dead yet

2005-03-21T17:24:00.000-05:00

The sexy Irish sweetheart I met last weekend has not called me back. I'm not going to get down about it though. What I have decided to avoid after this weekend though is the bar scene. I need a place where I have room to dance and the willingness of the women to dance with me. I don't always get the latter, but at least I have the former at a dance club. The bar was crowded and not much to speak of. I did however have my first tequila sunrise which was great. Tequila is my friend.

This coming weekend is going to be an excursion into the world of karaoke with Jay. I'm going to be drinking heavily, but I will prove to him that I am not a menace to myself or others when drunk. Unless you count the fact that I fully intend to get him on stage to sing Total Eclipse of the Heart with me. I'm looking for suggestions of other songs he and I might be able to perform a duet on. Bear in mind, neither one of us has any singing ability but then again, that's why they serve alcohol at places like this.

Okay so I haven't done the interesting stories links lately. Well, time to take care of that...

Germany has high unemployment rates, so why is a guy who is helping people get work getting such grief? Story here.

Abstinence pledge doesn't affect STD rates. Story here.

Low sugar cereals aren't really any better for you. Very brief story here.

Via Newmark's door, this story is depressingly funny. You have to love this intro "TORONTO - A letter from the Moncton Hospital to a New Brunswick heart patient in need of an electrocardiogram said the appointment would be in three months. It added: "If the person named on this computer-generated letter is deceased, please accept our sincere apologies."

Diamond wedding rings through sheer force of marketing seem to be making the way into China's culture. Interesting story, but I can't help but think that the story being missed is the increasing bargainning power women are beginning to gain in China. It isn't men who are pushing for diamond engagement rings, regardless of the advertising that is done.

Okay...enough of all that. Now a few quotes to round out my post for the day.

"Death is not evil, for it frees man from all ills and takes away his desires along with desire's rewards. Old age is the supreme evil, for it deprives man of all pleasures while allowing his appetites to remain, and it brings with it every possible sorrow. Yet men fear death and desire old age."

Giacomo Leopardi

"Real misanthropes are not found in solitude, but in the world; since it is experience of life, and not philosophy, which produces real hatred of mankind."

Giacomo Leopardi

"True love makes the thought of death frequent, easy, without terrors; it merely becomes the standard of comparison, the price one would pay for many things."

Stendahl

This one is for Matt:

"I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed shrink is our friend."
Jack Handy

"If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now."
Jack Handy

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink, because when they wake up in the morning, that's the best they're gonna feel all day." - Dean Martin

"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut." -- Ernest Hemingway

"I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered." -- George Best

"There are better things in life than alcohol, but alcohol makes up for not having them." -- Terry Pratchett

Okay...that's it for today. Peace out.

Finally, an update

2005-03-13T22:09:00.000-05:00

Wow, it has been awhile. It's mainly been because I have shed my former facade of dullness for a happening party going lifestyle that many think I should have experienced and gotten over years ago. I didn't party when I was in college...I worked nonstop and went to school...that was it. Then I worked 80 - 100 hours a week professionally...this is the first time in my life I've had the time to party and now people look at me like I'm some sort of freak. It really is annoying.

I spent a week in Madison. I was bright and alert during the day, usually the first one into the conference room. At night I went out and hit the bars and approached the women of the town and drank like a fish. I was responsible and together and yet I got the distinct impression my coworkers were looking down on me in some way. Paranoia perhaps, but I felt it. Anyway, I had a good time. I hit on many women, too many to count and made an impression I think that will stand the test of time.

All of my reports I was going to make about Madison though, pale in comparison to my news about this weekend and my night out on Saturday. My night was almost a complete bust, until an hour before closing when a sweet Russian blonde girl grabbed me by the arm and introduced me to a complete stranger as her cousin Vladamir. He did not believe this, but I persisted. He asked what I do for a living and I told him...my supposed cousin, more than a little drunk I think, responded "Really?" thus putting an end to the charade. I moved in though and blocked him out so he walked away. The Russian girl's friend was very attractive, and I flirted a little, considering the fact that I was drunk I think I did fairly well and her friends seemed to like me quite a bit. She lives in Chicago, but I go there a bit. I don't know if we will click when we speak and are both sober, but I hope so, because she was really cool.

Anyway...good mood will last until Thursday I'm guessing. Talk to you again then.

I've been in Madison

2005-03-12T20:00:00.000-05:00

I was in Madison, WI most of last week. Wow...was that an experience. My coworkers pretty much hate me or think me insane. It is an interesting feeling, but maybe I'm just being paranoid as this personality disorder test shows how screwed up I am...I hope to find the time tomorrow to give you a full report when I'm avoiding working in the office.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Very High
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	High
Borderline:	Very High
Histrionic:	Very High
Narcissistic:	Very High
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	Very High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

Hunter S Thompson

2005-02-22T19:34:00.000-05:00

"I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs, and insanity for everyone, but they always worked for me."

--Hunter S Thompson.

I'm sure you heard that Hunter killed himself the other day. I don't agree with all of his politics (I'm more of a P.J. O'Rourke--who also wrote for Rolling Stone--kinda guy) but he was a quintessential American writer. I don't think anyone got through an American literature class without reading quite a bit of his work. Some people apparently were shocked that he shot himself, saying things like "I would have thought it more likely for him to shoot me than himself" but I think considering his poor health that it is understandable and if there is a loving god, I don't imagine how this action could keep him out of heaven.

Anyway,

Rest in Peace.

I haven't posted in awhile

2005-02-22T17:59:00.000-05:00

Hi everyone,

I haven't posted in awhile mainly because if I posted about what I've been doing I'd probably have alot of irate people leaving comments about what a bad person I am...

I have rediscovered drinking at the age of 25. I never particularly liked drinking...I got drunk once when I was very young and bad stuff happened, so I only got drunk by myself for a very long time. Now that I have discovered that noone would possibly want to be with me, drinking in public has gotten more enjoyable. I would actually be very happy if some random woman would see me in my inebriated state and take advantage of me...in ways that don't just involve me buying them drinks.

I have discovered I am an excellent drunk and that drinking around people is not nearly as depressing as drinking by yourself. For those of you who don't believe that I am an excellent drunk...the police have actually indicated this to me as they know me extremely well by now. I had one tell me as he saw me entering a club on Saturday night to "Rock On!" He said this after confirming I had been at another club the night before and I was the same person he remembered. It made me feel all warm and tingly so I did 3 shots and hit the dance floor which at the time was practically vacant. Sure, I asked women to dance with me, but they all said no. Once I got on the floor, women danced with me, but none of them would do it for more than 5 or 10 minutes and I sure as hell didn't get any numbers out of the deal...in spite of the fact that there was one exceptionally hot blonde girl there who could have gotten me to crawl around on the floor and bark like a dog if she had asked...who am I kidding? Most attractive women could get me to do that when I'm sober.

I thought I was making progress with one girl who I kept buying shots of..."piece of ass" whatever the hell that is. She snuck away before dancing with me...possibly because I had my hands all over her, although in my defense I repeatedly asked her if it was alright and told her to tell me if i crossed a line.

So anyway...I also got banned from a club, apparently for life, despite the fact I did nothing wrong...if you don't believe I did nothing wrong (as many of my friends have indicated) then you can go to hell. Seriously, the cops said I was fine, the bouncers said there wasn't a problem, and the bartenders loved me. The owner of that club just doesn't like me. He as much as told me so when I spoke to him upon entering.

So anyway, I have been partying...trying to meet a hot blonde girl who will take advantage of me.

As a side note, I would like to relay this story from Saturday night...I am dancing by myself close to closing. A woman starts dancing very suggestively with me and asks me if I am there by myself and I say no...I ask her if she is there by herself...before she can respond her female friend comes over and tells me she is her girlfriend and starts to pull her away. As a joke, well 60% joke, 40% serious, I indicate that I would be willing to go home with both of them. This doesn't get them to stay? What is up with that?

Also, why is it that at closing time I am always dancing alone and creepy guys are dancing with the hot girls? I hate that.

I'll type more later if I can get up the energy.

When I'm drunk I'm popular with attached women and gay guys...what's up with that?

2005-02-14T14:45:00.000-05:00

Hi again all,

I had a weekend. I have taken to the bottle in a pretty spectacular fashion and it seems to be helping. On Friday night I went to Boogie Fever and drank vodka and cokes. Woman after woman refused my advances, but at the end of the night I got 3 very attractive women to dance with me...they all had boyfriends or husbands, but they danced with me and it felt good, especially the grinding...the grinding was very good. The most sober of the three asked me if I thought it was appropriate to touch female strangers the way that I was...they didn't seem to mind, but I backed off a little anyway. Sadly, I didn't get any phone numbers, but I consider the night a success nonetheless.

Then on Saturday night I went back. This time only one married woman danced with me. I did get hit on by three guys though. One of them flat out told me he thought I was "so hot" and "very cute." It felt good but then his female companion got pissed at me and pushed me away, though not before he leaned in to give me a kiss and then grabbed my head and pulled it in against his chest. The police took my car keys away and I had to pick them up on Sunday...I wasn't driving drunk or anything like that...they just came into the club, saw me dancing and decided that I shouldn't have my keys. The following day a full 12 hours after my last drink my breathalizer readout still came in too high for them to give me my car keys back. the bouncers at the club were also convinced I had taken other drugs along with the alcohol, but I swear I hadn't. I was going to try and be witty writing this recount and make it sound more interesting, but I haven't been able to accomplish anything today...all of the people I call are "out" and it is aggravating...arghhh.

Okay, more later...really.

Generally uninteresting update, with one funny link

2005-02-11T13:12:00.000-05:00

Via Newmark's Door, 51 easy steps to creating your own blog. Anyone who has a blog will instantly recognize that they went through virtually all of these steps and will then start drinking heavily.

In other news, April 1 -7 is going to be my California trip. I'm apprehensive. I adore the twins and am instantaneously distrustful of any guy they are with. It isn't that I am jealous, I am just distrustful. I can guarantee that the people they introduce me to during the week will not be good enough for them and I will have to bite my tongue so as not to offend them and have them avoid talking to me.

Hopefully I can make it through without totalling screwing up my relationship with them. It will be a long hard road, but I can't not go back and visit them.

I've more or less finished cutting off my ties with my coworkers. I sent an email politely requesting some of my DVD's back from one of them and sent an email with an excuse as to why I'm not going to be playing poker with them anymore that hopefully doesn't sound petty or lame.

The twins told me what I already know, that my method isn't likely to work in picking up women...I told them what they already know, that I don't have any other options. I can't blow my relationship with them because a) they are really cool and I like them, and b) they are going to be my last chance for getting attractive 18 year old girls to go out with me. In any case, back to the grindstone today and then tonight I do the clubbing thing.

Wish me Luck

I'm going to be less personal today.

2005-02-10T14:09:00.000-05:00

Okay, I've been ranting for a few days about things that I'm sure no one but me cares about, so now I'm going to link to a bunch of stuff that once again, most people are likely not to care about.

This paper, entitled "Fatal Attraction" is about "hide and seek" games (zero sum games where one player wins by matching the response of the other party and the other pary wins by mismatching the former players response). It is all good fun, and suprisingly begins with a Garrison Keillor quote.

Marginal revolution links to a paper estimating the costs of producing new drugs. It is pretty interesting, and actually reflects a lower number than I would have guess, if not higher than other people seem to think.

I also like Alex's point in this entry that it is a normative assessment to claim that young people die in car crashes because of brain immaturity. "I am bothered, however, by how much of this type of research is suffused with a normative bias. Why is taking risks always connected with brain immaturity? Why not say brain atrophy makes people stodgy and boring? Could it be that the researchers are not teenagers?"

Via geekpress, The song "Escape" in a tech world comes true.

For Jay, this is the story about the online sex offender database/dating service that I mentioned.

That is about it for today. On a personal note, I'm off to a good start on my 30 a week plan. I hit on one girl at the coffee shop this morning before I started work, one at my dry cleaners which I went to at lunch, and one at the grocery store, which I also hit at lunch. I figure I can easily hit 3 more tonight. Yes they were all rejections, but eventually some woman will have to be stupid enough to say yes right?

Have a good one all.

Quote of the day? "My days of not taking you seriously are seriously coming to a middle. " --Firefly

Complaining Board (you may want to skip this post)

2005-02-09T23:19:00.000-05:00

I had a long day. I drove up North about 5 hours had an appointment and began my journey back. All in all, I put in a 12 hour day, though I have to admit I sometimes don't feel it appropriate to refer to my driving time as working. I know that it is time devoted to my job, but it just seems funny to say that I talked on the phone, listened to talk radio, some music, and let my mind beat me up for awhile...that's the work I performed today. Sure I thought about my job and how to classify this and that and how to document this situation or that, but not too much. In any case, I got home and then decided to go back out clubbing...only problem is that the only club in the area that I thought I knew to be open late on Wed Night is Posh, and it turns out I was wrong...how could that happen? I was there once before on a Wed, which I thought was Salsa night, but they were closed when I got there tonight. I drove by some bars which were all dead and I decided to come back here and start typing.

Can I really claim that a day I was able to sum up in one paragraph was a long day? I don't know, but it felt long. I grew increasingly annoyed over the course of the day with the situation from my last post. I'm probably being petty, just like I claimed the others were being, but I have come to the conclusion that I don't want anything to do with the coworker who would never introduce me to any of his friends. The more I think about it and our conversations the more I resent him and the more of an asshole he seems to be. I think the great irony is that while he claims that I am the most selfish person he knows, it is in reality he who is the most selfish person he knows. He is infinitely more self involved than me, but he likes to pretend that he is somehow better than me. Perfect example, the redhead. He could have a poker game next week at his house and facilitate the mingling between the other coworker and her, but he won't because he doesn't want to play with four people. I basically pushed everything together for this guy to be in proximity to the redhead before and things didn't work out so I pursue something and I'm the bad guy, while he won't do anything to help the guy and he comes off as the good guy? What the fuck is that? He makes no effort in his relationships...the other people are always making the effort. He doesn't care about anyone but himself, but he likes to pretend otherwise...it makes him feel more human. I don't care that he is so selfish, it just pisses me off when he condemns me for it...

Argh...my blog has turned into a complaining board, which I hope to stop soon, but for now I just need to get it out.

In other news, there is no other news. I didn't talk to the twins last night...it may be a few days before I get to again so I'm on the way down from my high. I really do need an actual girlfriend. I've also almost given up on non-romantic socializing. I think there is a good reason that my long-term friends all live in other states than me. That is the kind of buffer I need to maintain a relationship with someone as a friend. And I can't be friends with women that I'm attracted to (and I think anyone who thinks that is the way to get the woman you are attracted to is smoking crack, because it doesn't work).

What was I rambling about? Basically the fact that all my social outlets in the area are dying and I've put in a Do not resuscitate order. Until I move I'm just going to have to try even harder on the woman front. My goal beginning tommorrow is to hit on/ask out 30 women a week. That is probably not too much higher than what I have been doing, but it is good to set up realistic goals.

I also need to find a drug dealer to keep my high going when I'm not able to talk to the twins (or for when my trip back blows up in my face and they decide they hate me).

I'm in a good mood, in spite of the fucked up stuff.

2005-02-08T23:00:00.000-05:00

I'm still in a good mood despite the fact that everyone around me (with the exception of Jay) is either petty or stupid (in many cases both). I stayed late at work talking to one of my coworkers because another coworker is all pissy about the redhead incident weeks ago. I could care less. I am not reveling in his pain or anything, but after hearing what he has told at least one person about the events of the night with the redhead it is clear to me that I really don't care if he never talks to me again. I didn't really care before that either, so maybe I'm not being fair. I know I probably sound bitter right now, but I'm not. I have thought about it and I think he really needs to believe that things didn't work out between him and the redhead because I was being a manipulative bastard and plotted to steal her away. I think it is preferable to the truth which is that he doesn't have the guts to go after anything that he wants and when it doesn't fall into his lap he gets all depressed and says "what is wrong with me."

In any case, I was talking with this other coworker about it he once again asserted that you need to be introduced to women by your friends. I asked him why if he believes that he doesn't attempt to introduce me to any of his friends. He basically said (though slightly more tactfully) that it is because he is ashamed of me and doesn't trust me not to completely piss anyone off. I have to say I think this is a fair assessment, but it aggravates me that he keeps asserting that you need to meet people through friends but he is unwilling to do it himself. (In fact he is not alone, many people share this opinion and will not introduce me to their friends...though why they then think I would be able to cultivate a friendship with a woman is beyond me.)

I also told him that trying to be friends with someone I am attracted to is impossible for me. The pain of watching someone that I want constantly with someone else is something I have experienced before and I will not experience it again. Also, the emotional investment in that relationship would escalate over time and considering how hard I take rejection on the one time meeting level, a prolonged relationship followed by a rejection might just kill me. Not to mention the fact that if I actually have a relationship with a woman when I ask her out, then I don't take no for an answer. I would continue to badger the woman into going out with me until she gets so pissed off that I have to move yet again. Ultimately, I am probably doomed to be alone forever because of this. I don't have the body to get women to go out with me based upon just the visual, and I don't have the capacity to be friends with a woman I am attracted to.

Yet, I am still in a good mood...why? The twins. I could fall for them...I think I really could. That would be frought with its own problems of course, but for the time being it is a possibility that is allowing me quite a bit of energy (despite a great lack of sleep). Also, the twins will be going to college soon and thus they will fully be expected to provide me with hookups to cute blonde freshmen girls, and best of all they understand this and are okay with it (they haven't spoken to my coworker who feels the shame).

I should also mention that my coworker has a really low opinion of me. Some of it is justified. I am a very selfish person which he seems to view as a negative trait, whereas I believe that everyone is very selfish and they try to fool themselves into believing they aren't. Of course, even by that standard I'm more selfish than most. I would sacrifice anything for a romantic/sexual relationship. There isn't anyone I wouldn't screw over if it meant that I would get the girl I want. He also believes I'm very manipulative. (I think he is actually the one who put the idea in the other coworkers head that I planned to steal her away before the comedy show). Now, do I try to arrange things to get me way? Yes. I do not however have the forsight in most instances to be as manipulative as he seems to think I am. I wish I did...if I was as manipulative as he thinks I am I would hope I would have been able to con some woman into going on at least one date with me...but alas no. Still, I'm not going to let it get to me. I don't know how long I have left on my high. Sooner or later I'm going to come down and go back into my depression. I can almost feel it happening actually. I realized today that the redhead never called me back about the social plans that are not a date. Now this is both good and bad. To be honest I don't think she and I should be friends because I would probably not be able to stop at some point and would end up obsessing about it, but at the same time the fact that no call has been returned at all makes me a little worried that I completely alienated her (why should I care about that since she has already rejected me? I'm still trying to figure that one out.) But that is off on the horizon. For the time being I'm planning to move to Cincinnati in November. I'm waiting for one of the twins to confirm what college she is going to, since if she picks one other than the one I'm thinking she will pick I might actually put in for a transfer to a different office than Cincinnati. I've also gotten a boost to my confidence due to the twins and am trying to parlay that confidence into some action before I go out to California.

I'm looking forward to a new start. To be honest with the exception of Jay and Matt (and I'm not just saying that because you are the only two who read this), I'm ready to be rid of everyone that I work with (or at least indifferent about some of them). I'm doing horrible on the dating scene out here (not that I've done any better anywhere else) so I could use a change of pace. Plus the pickup line that I'm new in town which seems like a winner for bold introductions to women is starting to lose its sincerity as I reach the one year mark. Yes, I definitely need to start to prepare to move as once I come down off this high I'm going to be very depressed indeed about my environment and my "friends."

I have an authentic valley boy "whatever."

2005-02-08T13:28:00.000-05:00

I talked to the twins again last night...I intended to be done at a reasonable hour, but increasingly I am of the belief that a reasonable hour when talking with them really is 3 o'clock in the morning. I enjoy chatting with them quite a bit and last night I got a little bit more attention from Tiger so she apparently doesn't hate me. She has also informed me that when I come to visit she is going to "goth me up." No, I will not be posting pictures of that. I'm going to let her of course though, because she purrs for me and I have to say if you heard her purr you wouldn't be able to say no either.

Two days in a row of a decent mood...this may be my longest record in many years. Hopefully I won't come crashing down tonight since we won't be chatting.

In other news, I'm driving up North tomorrow for an appointment and as usual they are expecting snow...I'm gifted at being able to generate snow on any occassion that I don't fancy it. Still, I only have the one appointment and it is later in the day so I expect it will be a good leisurly day.

I'll post some links later if I don't fall asleep,

Later.

Quote of the Day

2005-02-07T22:22:00.000-05:00

I've been reading Oliver Wendell Holmes recently and came across this passage:

"It is not enough for the knight of romance that you agree that his lady is a very nice girl--if you do not admit that she is the best that God ever made or will make, you must fight. There is in all men a demand for the superlative, so much so that the poor devil who has no other way of reaching it attains it by getting drunk."

I'd say pass me another shot if I weren't in a decent mood tonight.

I'm in a better mood

2005-02-07T17:13:00.000-05:00

Last night I had a four hour phone conversation almost entirely with "sweetness" as I have taken to calling her (her twin sister "Tiger" was aloof most of the night making me wonder if she still likes me). In any case it was a really good conversation. It was our first conversation that really involved sex since we met. I find that really strange considering how important sex is to me, but the twins are younger than me and it just didn't feel appropriate until recently to discuss such things.

Here is the big laugh of the night, she was under the impression that I wasn't particularly kinky...please try not to hit the person next to you as you flail your arms wildly in laughter. They are goth girls and apparantly a bit kinky as well so we had lots to talk about.

I miss Sweetness and Tiger alot and time has only made me even fonder of them. I found out that they blog, though I didn't mention my blog and wondered if they had already found it. I don't know why I didn't mention it...I don't ever say anything bad about them because there is nothing bad to say about either of them. They are sweet and funny and smart and I would only say good things about either of them, but I still didn't feel like I should let them know. I have had this problem with many people I know. The pressure of having a blog that all your friends read seems so much more daunting than something that just random people read. Of course, some day they might come across my blog and be annoyed I didn't tell them about it, but I hope that they can come back to this entry and note that it was not done out of malice.

I don't really want to let the entire world into the contents of the conversation between the two of us, but it was a pretty important phone call that has changed my mood drastically for the better so I figured I should mention it to any readers out there. I will not be drinking this week.

In other news, my hair stylist is going to find out relationship details about the new blonde girl at my hair salon so that I can approach her. I thought that was going to be the high point of my weekend, but it turned out that the phone call was...though technically the phone call occurred today (it started just after midnight and went to 4:30...I then got up at 8 before my alarm even went off...that tells you how good it was.

Anyway, I'm calling "sweetness" tonight. It will hopefully not blow up in my face the way my conversations with every other woman does.

The structure of high school sex i didn't get.

2005-02-02T17:37:00.000-05:00

Have you been thinking alot lately about the sex patterns of high school students? I know I have...wow does that sound bad...but luckily via geekpress this article is about that very subject.

"The results showed that, unlike many adult networks, there was no core group of very sexually active people at the high school. There were not many students who had many partners and who provided links to the rest of the community.
Instead, the romantic and sexual network at the school created long chains of connections that spread out through the community, with few places where students directly shared the same partners with each other. But they were indirectly linked, partner to partner to partner. One component of the network linked 288 students more than half of those who were romantically active at the school in one long chain. "

Okay...so apparently when we become adults some of you start hogging all of the sex for yourselves so the rest of us can't have any...of course I didn't have any in high school either so I guess I can't blame it all on adulthood. My question though, even though the move into adulthood didn't change my sex life one bit (or lack thereof), is why does the structure of the sexual social network change upon entering adulthood? Of course this high school could be an anomaly, but if it isn't, why would clustering start to take place in adulthood? I have a few theories, but they are all too depressing for me to think about right now so I'm just going to go feel old and leacherous...just another Wed Night.

Random links for the cry baby who called me today

2005-01-30T16:41:00.000-05:00

I have to stop picking up the phone when I'm drunk...

I am not giving all of you gawkers an insight into my private life today, instead I will be posting a few links since I apparently have an outraged reader who is offended that I have neglected to steal other people's research on the absurd for a few days...get off your high horse woman...anyway, here goes.

Monkey Porn. via Instapundit.

Via Marginal revolution another example of Krugman smoking crack.

Also via MR...cockfighting with boxing gloves?

Via geekpress, D&D themed sex? Granted I don't have sex, but still that seems strange even for me.

Okay...are you all happy? I wish I weren't so easily influenced by peer pressure. Don't come bothering me again until I have the dexterity to type at a rate faster than five words a minute.

I'm in a Rush

2005-01-26T14:55:00.000-05:00

Okay...I haven't updated in awhile and Matt indicated on the phone yesterday that this disturbed him. I wish I had updated yesterday, but alas I didn't and now everything has pretty much changed...or failed to change I guess more accurately.

Here are the events in a nutshell:

I went to comedy club with a coworker and the girl he is interested in.

Things went poorly for him and seemed to go fairly well for me. She and I seemed to be hitting it off and several people told me they construed her comments as interest in me. (Dear God why did I believe anyone making such insane statements?)

The girl has a nice body, though I wasn't fond of her face (freckles which I dislike, plus not blonde) but her personality seemed to more than compensate and for the first time in ages I guess I was genuinely attracted to a girl.

I call her up to basically ask her out last night and realize that she has no interest in me whatsoever (shouldn't we have assumed that to begin with?) and I further screw things up by being myself on the phone...it ends badly.

So then I drive back today from my appointment and decide I have to get drunk and go after a few dozen women. I talked to Jason and he will get me drunk later (many thanks to my knight in shining armor) but in the meantime I have way too much time and no clubs are open yet (and few seem to be open on Wed Night anyway. So I'm looking into flying to Boston for a couple of days (Lots of college campuses in close proximity means lots of college aged girls and lots of clubs which means maximum rejection in a confined period of time). One of my friends who has relatives that work with one of the airlines is looking into getting me a deal on a flight (I'm looking at 800 bucks roundtrip at such short notice which is insane...my backup is to fly to New York which is only 300, but I'm not sure where to go in New York...though I'm sure I could get a couple of people to drive down from Boston or I could drive up from there, but its a four hour trip (more with traffic) which could be problematic.

The story should probably be more thoroughly explained than what I just gave ya'll, but I'm in a bad mood so go screw yourselves if you have a problem with how I explained it.

Incidentally...just because I was attracted to a girl with a face I didn't like does not mean I'm suddenly going to be chasing any dog on the street--(the person who this statement was for knows who they are).

I'll post again when I feel like it...which may be never so it will be interesting to check the site meter periodically to see how long it takes before people stop coming around.

Night

British Television Quotes (Because I'm classy)

2005-01-17T23:29:00.000-05:00

Quotes from Coupling:

Jill: [about the film "Lesbian Spank Inferno"] How could you possibly enjoy a film like that? Steve: Oh, because it's got naked women in it! Look, I like naked women! I'm a bloke! I'm supposed to like them! We're born like that. We like naked women as soon as we're pulled out of one. Halfway down the birth canal we're already enjoying the view. Look, it's the four pillars of the male heterosexual psyche. We like: naked women, stockings, lesbians, and Sean Connery best as James Bond. Because that is what being a bloke is. And if you don't like it, darling, join a film collective. I want to spend the rest of my life with the woman at the end of the table here. But that does not stop me wanting to see several thousand more naked bottoms before I die. Because that's what being a bloke is. When Man invented fire, he didn't say "Hey, let's cook!" He said: "Great! Now we can see naked bottoms in the dark!" As soon as Caxton invented the printing press we were using it to make pictures of - hey! - naked bottoms. We've turned the Internet into an enormous international database of... naked bottoms. So, you see, the story of male achievement through the ages, feeble though it may have been, has been the story of our struggle to get a better look at your bottoms. Frankly, girls, I'm not so sure how insulted you really ought to be.

Steve: [about the Fertility Clinic's cubicle] It's this place. It's too wholesome. Look, it's wrong for masturbation. Masturbation is supposed to be a bad thing. It's a stealth activity. You do it on your own, in secret, and you lie about it afterwards. You feel guilt! It's one of the last forms of entirely safe guilt left available to a man. I mean, look at this place! Look what the mad fools have done: it's an office suite for masturbation. There's a *receptionist*. There are no receptionists in masturbation. Do you realize what I'm supposed to do here? Do you understand the insanity of it? I am being asked to masturbate in a *good* *cause*. No. Susan, I implore you. I implore all women everywhere on behalf of all men. Do not take the wrongness of masturbation from us.

Steve: We are men. Throughout history we have always needed, in times of difficulty, to retreat to our caves. It so happens in this modern age that our caves are fully plumbed. The toilet for us is the last bastian, the final refuge, the last few sqaure feet of man space left to us. Somewhere to sit, something to read, something to do, and who gives a damn about the smell. But that for us is happiness because we are men. We are different. We have only one word for soap. We don't own candles. We have never seen anything of any value in a craft shop. We do not own magazines for the photographs of celebrities with all their clothes on. When we have conversations we actually take it in turns to talk. We have not yet reached that level of earth shattering boredom and inhuman despair that we would have a haircut recreationally. We don't know how to get excited about really, really boring things like ornaments, bath oil, the countryside, vases, small churches. We do not even know what, what in the name of God's ass, is the purpose of potpouri. Looks like breakfast, smells like your auntie. Why do you need that? So please, in this strange and frightening world, allow us one last place to call our own. This toilet, this blessed pot, this fortress of solitude. You girls, you may go to the bathroom in groups of two or more. We do not pass comment. We do not make judgement. That is your choice. But we men will always walk the toilet mile alone.

Steve: What is this? Susan: It's a cushion. Steve: Right. Yes. Thank you for that. Very informative. [to Jeff] Steve: You got any of these? Jeff: No. Steve: Of course you haven't. [to shop assistant] Steve: You - are you married? Living with anyone? Junior Shop Assistant: No. Steve: Got any of these? Junior Shop Assistant: No. Steve: Of course not. Okay! [to the women] Steve: You bring these things into our homes. They sit on our chairs. They watch our televisions. Now, I just need to know, on behalf of all men everywhere, I just need to ask, please... What are they for? I mean, look at them! Look at the chubby little bastards! Just sitting around everywhere! What are they, pets for chairs? [to shop assistants] Steve: Come on, you sell them. What are they for? Junior Shop Assistant: Well... Senior Shop Assistant: You sit on them. Steve: Ah! Ha ha ha! You see, that's where you're wrong! Nobody sits on them. Okay, watch this. Here's the cushion. I'm putting it on the sofa. Now watch me. I'm stting down. And what do I do on my final approach? I - oh! - move the cushion! You see? It's not involved! It's not part of the whole sitting process. It just lies there. It's fat litter! It's a sofa parasite! Jane: It's, you know... padding. Steve: Oh, padding! Now, that's interesting, Jane. See, I like padding. If I was, say, an American Football player, and all those big bastards running at me, I would say "give me some of that padding and be quick about it." If my job involved bouncing down jagged rocks I would say "in view of those jagged rocks down there, I'll have some of that padding, thank you very much." But Susan, Sally, Jane, this is a sofa. It is designed by clever scientists in such a way as to shield the unprotected user from the risk of skin abrasions, serious head trauma, and, of course... [drops behind sofa, then sticks head out] Steve: Daleks. Trust me girls, trust me on this one: you do not need padding to tackle upholstery. So please - once and for all, tell me why on Earth you would want me to sit on one of these? Susan: Because, if you pressed it firmly against your bottom, it might stop you talking!

I don't know if any of these will seem half as funny out of the context of the show...but they sure make me laugh.

Stolen Links...cause I'm evil

2005-01-17T18:46:00.000-05:00

Today was particularly quiet in the office despite the fact that 2 other people showed up. Everyone was in a mood. On the upside I've been working quite a bit. I got an insane call from my mom this morning not too long after I got in and it pissed me off. I'm pretty sure she is waiting for me to call her back, but its just not going to happen so think what you want of me...I'm not falling into that trap.

Okay...what is in the news today? Well, everything I have today is stolen from other bloggers since I was working today and my data mining abilities were on that task...so here goes.

This article was linked to by the good folks over at MR. The salient passage:

"An essay that does little more than restate the question gets a 1. An essay that compares humans to squirrels -- if a squirrel told other squirrels about its food store, it would die, therefore secrecy is necessary for survival -- merits a 5. Brian A. Bremen, an English professor at the University of Texas at Austin, notes that the writer provides only one real example. Nevertheless, he says, the writer displays "a clear chain of thought" and should be rewarded, "despite his Republican tendencies."

For those of you who are going to assume that the article is from some republican magazine like the weekly standard without actually clicking on the link...it is from the washington post and no other mention is made in the article about the bizarreness of this line.

Via geekpress, this story on potential non lethal weapons is interesting as well as stupifying.

And I might just mention that Voxbaby is doing an excellent job providing some alternatives on Social Security...no particular post, but if you look at the entries for the last couple of weeks you will see what I mean.

My weekend

2005-01-16T21:29:00.000-05:00

Confession time...Friday was my birthday...I am a quarter of a century old and getting older everyday. I know it sounds absurd, but when you are attracted to young looking women it is particularly depressing to know that every day there are fewer and fewer who would be willing to talk to you let alone have sex with you.

I'm 25 years old...I have never had a girlfriend...I have never been on a date...I have never had sex...and let me be perfectly clear here, things are only going to get harder in the next 25 years. I made my move for the sexy 18 year old hot blonde who works at the car dealership. She has already expressed concern at how old I am, but I tried again anyway...even despite the fact she now has a boyfriend. I was to put it mildly, pathetic. I couldn't stop pushing. I couldn't stop trying to convince her she should be going out with me. I ask out A LOT of women and get rejected everytime without fail. Sometimes it is really amazing how agressively they reject me. The hot blonde from the dealership (she does have a name and I know it believe it or not, but I'm not using it to protect her identity) was very sweet and nice about the rejection...but she is probably the woman I have found most appealing since I moved to Michigan so it hurt more than normal. As a result I got a couple of bottles of Vodka and when my roommate left I began drinking...heavily. I was hoping I could drink enough to forget my humiliation and for that matter, my name...alas the result was more of me thinking about how screwed up I am and how it was probably smart for Emily to cut off all contact with me.

The truth is that as much as I like my job and have a really good life...I still find myself feeling lonely, miserable, and despondent. It is self-pity really. I don't really have any right to complain. How many people not only don't have anyone, but are stuck in a job they hate or are homeless or any number of other problems that make mine pale in comparison? And then for me to indulge my pain as though it is legitimate and to take to my blog and continue the self-indulgence is really pretty pathetic...but here I am. I guess everyone has a right to complain, but I know if I were telling my problems to myself I would be rolling my eyes at how stupid I was being.

And yet I continue. I can tell you today what the rest of my life will be like. I will live in Michigan for 3 - 4 years before becoming so depressed with my love life that I try to escape all my failures and rejections and ask for a transfer to somplace else...maybe someplace close at first...Cincinnati or Chicago. Then in another few years the same thing will happen again and a few years after that again...and again...and again. Soon I'll be 50, with no friends, no love life, and very little reason to get up in the morning. My job will keep me going if I'm lucky until I retire, but sooner or later I'll become so bitter that I won't be able to do my job and will have to leave. Once that happens I'll become a hermit, never letting my wrinkled old body leave the house to be reminded that there are so many young women in the world who find me to be a disgusting creepy old man. One day I'll buy a gun and blow my brains out not to be discoverd for many months. The truth is that that scenerio is actually not my nightmare scenerio. My nightmare scenerio is that I buy the gun and never work up the nerve to kill myself and as a result go on living day after day becoming more miserably depressed until I lose control of my bodily functions and have to hire some middle aged nurse to come change my diapers for years until I die in a puddle of my own piss when my heart gives out while I'm attempting to obtain an erection.

So this is what my weekend has primarily been about...me trying to cope with the inevitable thread of my life. Hopefully tomorrow I will be able to post something a little less self-indulgent and a little bit more upbeat...I'll find some television quotes or something.

Night all.

My AP site isn't working so this is all you get today.

2005-01-14T13:58:00.000-05:00

Well, linking to this essay may be a little late (it was intended for the holidays) but I think it is still worth pointing to. It is in praise of misers, such as Scrooge.

"Scrooge has been called ungenerous. I say that's a bum rap. What could be more generous than keeping your lamps unlit and your plate unfilled, leaving more fuel for others to burn and more food for others to eat? Who is a more benevolent neighbor than the man who employs no servants, freeing them to wait on someone else?"

I think the essay makes a valuable point, but could be misleading as well. The idea that those who do not live a miserly lifestyle and are still not generous, those that consume only for their own benefit, are somehow to be viewed negatively seems to be the unintentional message. This is not true however. So long as everyone consumes according to their own desires and within their capacity to demand (demand is meant in the economic sense) then they are doing the best service possible. It is only when market forces are allowed to work to allocate resources according to our revealed preferences that we can say that progress has been made. If a miser prefers to save every cent possible than he is not distorting the market away from a better more effecient world, but if he is forced to save and does not prefer it, then he may cause the underproduction of some good society would prefer to have more of. Should we praise Scrooge (before his reformation)? Yes. Should we condemn Lord Mayor for his consumption? No.

Just a thought for the day.

In other news, Arizona sheriff orders pink handcuffs for prisoners. They will match the pink boxer shorts and bed that they sleep in.

Quick News Story

2005-01-13T23:23:00.000-05:00

I saw this story and it reminded me of an argument I got into with a ardent feminist I knew in college. She claimed conservative men just couldn't stand the thought of a woman in power and I retorted that Margaret Thatcher is considered by most conservatives to be one of the best world leaders of the 20th century. She stared at me aghast and said...I swear I am not making this up..."that's just because she didn't care about protecting other women. " How do you respond to something like that?

In any case, this passage from the AP story caught me off guard:

The bizarre coup plot drew mercenaries from elite British schools into an attempt to take over Africa's third-largest oil producer, which is led by a dictator with reported cannibalistic tendencies.

Canabalistic tendencies? Maybe I'm off point here but where is the line between canabalistic tendencies and canabalism? Just a weird thought for the day.

On another note...I will be approaching the hot blonde at my car dealership on Saturday and asking her out again. I'm going to be suave and forceful, causing her to swoon as she is taken over by my animal magnetism...sure some women only see the drooling and groveling, but underneath that there are loads of animal magnetism that is simply irresistible.

Wish me luck.

Geek Pick up Lines

2005-01-12T14:28:00.000-05:00

Via Geekpress, top 11 geek breakup lines. (My question is why does a geek have to break up with an inflateable doll? Can't you just let out the air and put her back in the closet?)

Some examples:

Now that Half Life 2 is out, I need to refocus my priorities.

I need a lover who understands that 20 hours a day on the Internet is normal.

My favorite is the honest approach

I'd like a true beauty so I don't have to spend so much time photoshopping your ugly face out of our photos.