Friday, December 10, 2004

 

Emo Phillips Quotes

For some reason the number of posts on my dashboard won't change from 90...it is weird...it's like I'm stuck in one place, which is kinda like my progress today. I couldn't get ahold of anyone. It is hindering my productivity something fierce.

Anyway...today I have some quotes for ya all.

Emo Philips:

Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something...

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

My girlfiend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine'.

Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.

The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks.

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.

Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil.

Comments:
"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."

That cracks me up!
 
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